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Hogan's Heroes - Season 6
Quotes and Sound Clips
Frankly, General, I Thought It Was
Now, Schultz, How Do You Want Your Steak?
I Have This Always With Me
You Are Going to Cook a Dinner Just for Me, Cockroach?
Klink, Stop Agreeing With Me
Well, Look at It This Way
I'd risk malnutrition for you.
You Prefer Meringue Glace?
No, but I Just Took Another Look
You Mean You're Afraid of a Little Thing Like Getting Shot?
Colonel Hogan, I Have Faced Danger Before
Here, This Is for You
You Can Release Men for Guard Duty
No, Klink, It's Staying Here, That's the Secret, Dummkopf
Three Moving Rocket Launchers
Klink, I Have an Important Assignment for You and Your Men
Blimey, That's Like Trying to Find a Needle in a Haystack
Carter, You Didn't Get the Windshield
If You Are Smart, Colonel, You Will Change the Tire
You didn't say "please"
My Men Volunteered for This Detail
Let's Go, Let's Go!
Schultz, Get Some Aspirin From the Dispensary Immediately
Hey, and Another Thing, Schultzy
Oh, Please, Boys, Get Into the Truck
All Right, Gentlemen
We Might Be Able to Use Hot Lips Here
I had to come all the way to Germany to be in a chain gang
I don't know about the rest of you, but he's driving me bloody crackers
Why Don't I Wait in Her Dressing Room
You Know, Schultz
I Didn't Hear You, Schultz
Now That We've Lost Our Explosives
Sounds Like a Swinging Band, Schultz
Well, There Goes Our Truck
He's a Jolly Fellow, Isn't He?
Don't Forget Our Deal
Why Don't You Order Your Men to Do It?
That's a Blessing in Disguise, Schultz
Why Don't You Go on Sick Call?
Rudolph the red-nosed Kraut
Maybe I Can Make It Into Town Before the Raid
What's That For?
You Know, With the Food Shortage
Who Cares if She's a Beautiful Dancer at the Hausnerhof
Will You Stop That Singing, Please?
You Know I Like You
I Have the Funniest Feeling
I Suppose That Deep Down I Really Suspected Him
Is That the Fanciest Uniform You Could Get?
Lebeau, I Need a German Officer's Uniform
Since when do the guests clean up?
I'd Say You're in a Spot, Sir
I Think That's Ridiculous
You Can Rely on My Discretion
But Why Are You So Interested in Him?
Major Pruhst, How Very Nice to See You
I Will Be Invited
Hogan! You're doing it to me again
May I remind you there's a war going on?
Look, Hogan, I'm Going to Get to the Point
Were Aware of the Fact that this is a prison camp?
Just as I Thought
The Whole Thing Is Too Pat, Like a B Movie
Hey, Hitting the Sauce a Little Early, Commandant
Next Time, Find Somebody More Mature
If Only We Had Met Sooner
How many times must I tell you? Never feed a Kraut at the table
Why Don't You Tell Him?
Is Klink Upset by Wolfgang Being Made the Adjutant?
Schultz is drowning in the punch bowl again
Let Go, Frenchie, I Can Handle This
Don't Come to Attention, I'm Just Passing Through
Ah, We Can't Turn You Down
That Kraut, Adjutant?
That's Hard to Believe
Major Karp, Any Fiance of Gertrude's
What Is This Remarkable Fascination I Have for Women?
Oh, That Violin... I Thought I'd Scream
Was I Gone Long?
You Make Such Beautiful Music, Wilhelm
Beautiful, Herr Kommandant, Beau-Ti-Ful
That's the Smallest General I Ever Saw
We're From the Insurance Company
Oh, His German's Bloody Awful
How Could You Know How I Feel, Hogan?
You're going to be the first German kamikaze pilot
If This Is a Trick, Heads Will Roll
Hogan Has Defected, Hochstetter
Klink, Stay Out of This
And You Have Lost It!
You're Not Going, Schultzy?
Have a Good Time There, Boychiks
Where Is My Rocket?
You Know We've Got Three Chances
If There's Any Calls for These Gentlemen
You're Going to Fly It Out of Here?
You Know, I Think I Felt Better
The details are nothing
Hogan Darling, you're not thinking
I Shall Remain Outside on Guard, Lovely Lady
For This, You Are Unrestricted
One Thing I Have to Say for You, Colonel
Just seemed to me the Third Reich could use a little help
Hogan Darling, Without Your Strength
Kiss me first, then tell me how clever I am
We Are Here to Recover a Rocket
You've Been Holding Out on Us, Hogan
Hogan Darling, Fly to Me!
Excuse Me, Colonel, but Don't I Seem to Recall
I give you a hint
Colonel Hogan, You'll Never Guess
How Long to Disarm It?
We All Make Mistakes, Sir
Klink, if There Is One Thing I Hate
Klink, if You Don't Shut Up
Hauptmann's chances are pretty good?
I'd Prefer You Keep Saying He's Innocent, Klink
I'm Glad to See You've Come Around
Hochstetter, Klink Is a Fine Actor
The Gestapo never arrests the wrong man. It's against the rules
Innocent? I think you should try that plea of insanity, for yourself
Mmm, It Does Smell Good
The Next Time We Do Business With the Enemy
You Wouldn't Want to Tell Me Where It Is
Corporal Newkirk Was a Successful Barrister Before the War
Why Did You Volunteer to Take the Case?
How Do You Expect to Get Him Off
What's Your Defense, Sir?
I Understand You're Counsel for the Defense
Ja, Kommandant Klink
Since when is he running this prison camp?
No Officer on My Staff Would Oppose Me
I Am the Gestapo
The Fuhrer Doesn't Want the People to Know
Try two candy bars
You think I would tell you such a thing for one candy bar?
No Deal, Schultz
Very, Very Thoughtful of You, Schultzy
You're the Most Nervous War Hero I've Ever Known
I would be shot for treason!
I Do Hope You Like Fish and Chips
It's Quite an Achievement to Get a German Officer
I Wouldn't Dream of Leaving
Hogan, I Would Like to Inform You
Go tell it to your chaplain
Believe Me, General Burkhalter
First I send you to the psychiatrist
It's so relaxing
When Did You Say My Little Bublishkibble Will Be Back?
Like blintzes and sour cream
German Troops Are Eating Their Cartridge Belts
I'm not too thrilled at seeing you, either
That's Why We Got to Get Klink to Request the Transfer
What About Our Operation Here?
Gentlemen, I've Reached a Decision
I'm Surprised at You, Colonel
You Clumsy Clod!
You Are Too Modest, Colonel
How Are Things in Downtown Siberia?
A Rather Impudent Little Wine
I Always Taste the Food Prepared by the Enemy
Why kill all your appetites
Do You Think It's a Good Idea
Colonel Hogan, Colonel Klink Wants to See You in His Office
It Is Hard to Dig a Tunnel
You are a commandant just like me
We Do Not Have Such Fancy Cigars on the Russian Front
I Say He's Here to Arrest Klink for Impersonating an Officer
It's Really Nice to Know, Though, That When I'm 70
It's Just as Well Mrs. Schtottlemeyer Cannot Come
Lebeau Has Done an Excellent Job
Lebeau, Your Hors D'oeuvres Are a Smash
I'd rather face the Russians
The Colonel's gone crackers
Hey, Is This Tea Going to Be Formal Then?
We don't drink anything we don't stomp on
Schultz, Don't You Know You're Supposed to Be Announced?
I Wish I'd Been So Lucky
Commandant, I Don't Think the Geneva Convention
They're Having a Terrible Time in Russia
Sir, a Little Something for the Boys in Stalingrad
Was He Really That Good, Schultz?
Schultz, in This Weather, I Don't Want to Talk to Him
Are You Pulling My Leg, Carter?
What's the Matter, Cockroach?
I've Lost More Blood Than This Shaving!
With a Wound Like That
There's Nothing More Than a Scratch
At Least the German Army Can't Shoot Any Better
If One Does Not Vary One's Disguises
I was expecting somebody with high heels
He Was Germany's Top Female Impersonator
You Don't Have to Worry About Oskar Danzig
Carter, Get Rid of That Bush
Better Get Some Sleep, Schultz
I was the guard on duty
Let's Go! Raus, Raus, Raus, Raus!
Poor Guy Must Have Hurt His Head in the Plane Crash
He Is Still Convinced the Attack Will Come From the South
He Has a Little Office Like This?
Berlin Is Just a State of Mind
We Can't Be Too Careful
That Stupid Colonel!
Of Course He's Unhappy; Who Wouldn't Be?
I Made a Pledge
Thanks to some fine German Surgery
You're Going to a German Intelligence Meeting?
How Can You Think You Know What He Wants Me to Do
No good Heime Bellheim should stay away from Helga Schimmel
No. You Cannot Speak to Helga Now
I'll Dig Up a Bunk Somewhere
I should be in espionage work. I have a great talent for it
The-the Fools Even Consider Me a Hero
So You Are Really German?
He's a Hero, All Right, but for the Wrong Team
Any Landing You Can Walk Away From Is a Good One
Sorry I Couldn't Give You Advanced Notice
All Right, Gentlemen. Another Guest
Who Are You Dancing With, Schultz?
Hogan, I'm Touched
Happy Hun Hamburger Stands?
I Hope You Know What You're Doing
Just call me anxious
What about, Schultz?
What Are Our Chances, Colonel?
All Right, Get Ready to Move
How'd You Ever Get to Be a Colonel?
Hogan, We're in Luck
Happy Landing... Buddy!
What Do You Say? What Do You Say?
Hey, How About You and the Bald Guy
I Miss My Bedtime Cup of Cocoa
You Americans Have a Very Sloppy Security
None of us are perfect
You Could Pass for a Kraut Anytime, Sir
Well, Colonel Hogan
Who's Going to Accompany Me?
Colonel, Are You Sure You're Doing the Right Thing?
The Krauts Have a Spy Organization in England
How Can You Sleep After a Decision Like That?
The Way Those Krauts Spend Money
Ask a Terrible Question, You Get a Terrible Answer
I'll just stay in my motel
You Just Don't Walk Into an American Air Force Base
A Little Teutonic Humor to Go With the Wine and the Rich Food?
Is That All You Want?
It Is Doing Considerable Damage to the Luftwaffe
Powder your nose
You're a Very Thoughtful, Considerate, Generous Host
They Didn't Promise Anything Like This
That Burkhalter Is All a Kraut
Everything looks so good
Remember, Your Cooperation Is Essential
Is Everything Ready, Schultz?
Go to your quarters and stick more pins in your Hochstetter doll?
That Man Kills Me
I may have to come over to your side, Klink
Very Thoughtful of You, Hogan
Relax. Even if We Get Caught
Just a simple yes will do
You Should Lay Off That Liverwurst, Schultz
Hey, Schultzy. Schultz, Listen
I Shall Give the Gestapo my cooperation
Maybe They Went for a Walk
Those guys aren't scientists. They're magicians
We Are Carrying With Us Five Flasks of Heavy Water
We Are Determined Not to Work for Hitler
Boy, you Germans really keep busy
I intend to settle down here
Well, if It Isn't the Strudel King
Don't Push, Cockroach!
We Promised Hermann that we would drop by
The usual exchange of information
You Know, I Am Very Fond of Science
Baker, Get on the Switchboard
All Right, Knock It Off
Colonel, He's Insulting Me!
My Mind Went Blank
Papa Bear Calling Hopscotch
You're Like a Housewife
The Explosion Must Have Brought Him Back to Normal
Schultz, I'm Ordering You to Advance
You're Joking, Errol Flynn would have trouble
Bloody Marvelous. You Never Told Me
Hello, Phantom, This Is Papa Bear
Klink Dipsy Doodle!
Come on, Commandant
I'm in the Future
Hogan, Would You Please Tell Rudolf Valentino Here
Tomorrow, We Start Operation Gypsy
Dearest Wilhelm, How Are You?
Now, if Klink Believes Our Little Gypsy Knows Everything
Klink Believes in Fortune-Tellers
The Lightning Hit You, Lebeau
That Bloody Klink
Get the Bellboys, Get Your Bags
What Could Be Better Than Sergeant Schultz
We need a picture that captures the carefree look
No Cameras Allowed in Camp
Yeah, It's Got a Lot of Dials and Switches
And Stop Looking at My Chart!
I Didn't Know You Went in for Astrology
There Are at Least a Dozen Holes in the Roof
I'm Getting Too Old to Be a Prisoner of War
Hogan, You're the Best Enemy a Man Ever Had
Uh, What Is This Music in the Car?
When I Asked for Volunteers for That Assault Force
Feel Perfectly Free to Talk in Front of Me
You Know, Schultz
Don't Tell Me, Colonel Hogan
Frulein Hilda, Get Schultz
And I Cannot Tell You How Disappointed I Am
Who will make the frontal attack?
Major Hochstetter, there are some reports to finish
After All, Schultz Isn't the Only Crook Around Here
I Know Nothing About the Radio
Got any answers, sir?
Klink, This Is Classified Information
One of Our Radio Detector Units has picked up a transmitter
Major Hochstetter's Here to See You
You are a wily old lech
All Right, What Did I Do and How Did I Do It?
Now you're using your head
Well, You're Crazy to Drive a Car
Now, Look at That Speedometer
It's not our fault you got a lemon
What's wrong with my condition?
Lebeau, Get to Work
Isn't It About Due for Its Thousand- Mile Checkup?
What Condition Is Klink's Car In?
Here's the Assignment-- Double Red
Hogan, Are You Trying to Bargain With Me?
The Lone Ranger Only kisses Silver
Now, Look, if Our Plan Works
Hello, Jolly Roger Calling Papa Bear
you are defying the Furhrer
The Road Is Mined, Too
If you hit a mine you're going to fly to Berlin
Himmler Has Invited Hitler to Be Present
You're Ruling This Camp with an iron hand
You Don't Mind if I Run My Own Stalag, Do You?
No One Will Commit Suicide in Stalag 13
Home Brew Made With Potato Skins
Don't Press Too Hard
I'm Going to Need a Gestapo Uniform
What Are You Going to Do for Pete's Sakes
Someone shoot a horse?
In Appreciation, I Shall Reward You
Don't worry, you can get more!
You May Inspect Here Anytime You Wish
There is something romantic about a skull
Your Secretary Looks as if she could start fires
Those Bloody Krauts,They Think of Everything
Can't You Knock or Cough or Anything?
I Know Nothing! Nothing!
So, How'd It Go, Schultz?
How Can You Lose a Load of Dynamite
A munitions dump of our very own
You go up with us
Commandant, Unless That Stuff Is Moved
There is no such thing as civilized warfare
Schultz, What Are You Going to Do About Your Wife
You Leaving Us?
Any More Excuses, Schultz, Huh?
May I Ask What the Dynamite Is For?
Klink Doesn't Scare Easy
You Run Such a Perfect Camp, Klink
Andrew, the Complaint Department's on the Third Floor
Nitro or Dynamite
Well, We Never Dared Hope, Sir
I Find This Whole Thing Quite Strange
Nein, Herr Kommandant
Have All Security Precautions Been Strictly Observed?
Did You See How I Fooled That Stupid Trooper
I Don't Mind the Big Sacrifice
No, Call It an Omen
Eh, Maybe It's Just as Well, Schultz
It's the Acoustics, Darn It!
I want to see if he can crack the glass
He's Singing in the Shower
What the Heck Is That, an Air Raid?
It May Be Our Ballpark
There's Nothing to Worry About
I use a German miracle soap
A Little Old Rub-a-Dub-a-Dub, Huh?
We got to!
There goes the neighborhood
Well, Obviously It Was
Dismissed! My string quartet is rehearsing in town this morning
Well, I, Uh, Guess I Was Wrong, Mom
What Do You Think They Want the Rec Hall For?
Raus, Everybody, Raus
Jawohl, Herr Kommandant
Stop me if I'm too technical
I'd never spoil your record
Why is your monocle sweating?
My career destroyed, too
I Could Be Very Upset About This
Major Hochstetter, the Next Time
You Plant One of Your Spies in My Camp
But Because of Your Attitude
It Is Against the Rules of This Camp
I Lost Control
Colonel, Could You Use Another Man for Cover?
As I Said, We're Going to Lay Low for a While
Someday We'll Steal a Train, We've Got Ourselves a Subway
Did You Say Emergency Tunnel?
Klink Must Be an Idiot
Klink and the Guards
What do you think of Ty Cobb?
Give Him a Routine Check
Did You See a Rainbow?
395th Bomb Squadron
I'll Try to Make You Comfortable, Captain
Captain Martin Has Been Assigned
We Try to Maintain an Informal Atmosphere
My First Responsibility Is the Protection of This Unit
The Gestapo will throw itself at you
He Is Not Adding Anything to This Meeting
Is There Anything Here That Interests You, Sergeant?
So is the Russian front
We've Been Busy as Beavers
You better shop around for a cheaper war
It Will Be on Your Bill
And No More Leaves for the Next Five Years
What good is a rusty monocle?
Hogan, You Must Think I'm an Awful Dummy
Just outside Stalingrad, there's an igloo with your name on it
No Matter What We Do
Remember Me? I'm Your Strudel Connection
Papa Bear to Cannonball, Papa Bear to Cannonball
That Tub of Lard Is Going to Put Us Out of Business
Hercules, if You're Ever in This Neighborhood Again
There's More Than One Way Around a Schultz
He's a hard case under all that blubber
Commandant Schultz, I Have a Question, Sir
Let's Hear It for Bloody Old Schultz
I am not a train
Schultz, Remember the Children's Story About the Train
You Come on Strong, Act Big
I'm a Highly Efficient, Well-Trained Officer
It Wouldn't Surprise Me if Someone Came Along
I need a lot of rest
Could he change his mind?
You're in a Lot of Trouble
This Order Is Insane, Absolutely Insane
Give senior noncommissioned officers "command training"
May as well make yourselves comfortable
Those Bloody Krauts
Did You Ever Hear of Anybody Sneaking Into a p.o.w. Camp?
If You Know How to Conquer the World Cheaper
We Are Baking a Cake
Where Did You Get That Agreement?
How About Celebrating With Some Extra Hot Water for the Men, Sir
Hogan, Now You're Treating Me Like a Child
You'd Never Believe What's in It
That Is Treason!
Since the Strudel Festival in Munich
Girls. That Never Would've Occurred to Me
They Must Have the Whole Place Bugged by Now
I am willing to cooperate with you
Believe Me, for the First Time
An Excellent Report, Major Strauss
Eh, What Do You Got There?
No more wine for this table
All Right, Who's the Wise Guy
Anybody Else Want to Stick His Head in the Sand
We Managed to Get the Luftwaffe Housebroken
How Could a Man Talk to Me for Three Minutes
Gestapo will take over Stalag 13
Are you surrendering to me?
I'm on a Diet, Major
Kill him because he is your husband or because he isn't your husband
No, Herr Kommandant, I Did Not Close My Eyes
And You Are Sir Charles Chitterly?
And You Wish Me To Notify Berlin At Once
A Record of Everything We've Purchased
Beastly Bore Being a Fascist
I Might Have Gone on for Years More Dead Than Alive
Ripping, We Actually Pulled It Off
Lovely Talking With You, Dolf
One Small Change of Plan
Charles Will Talk to You, but He's Such a Sweet Stupid
How Did They Get Out?
You're Commandant of a Blasted Ant Hole, Klink
Now, Sir Charles, for Your Dinner Tonight
Go Away, You Dreadful Beasts
I'm Sure That by Now You've Got Some
Do Better for Dinner, Dear Boy
It's Brave Enough in the Bottle
Ah, a Thousand Pardons
Sorry, Dear Boy. Like to Help You
Be a Dear Boy
What Super Luck Finding You Here
Just the three of us, remember?
She knows this man?
Out! Shultz, Throw This Man Out Immediately
Dolf Is a Crashing Bore
I See Nothing!
How Far Do You Think I Can Trust You?
Only Give her about 20% of your charm
Hogan, a Deucedly Attractive Woman and All That
Oh, General Von Schlomm, Would the General Like Me
That, Sir, Is the Remark of a Cad
But Dash It All, Hogan, I'm Not Ready
Klink, This Mission Is Top, Top Secret
The Fuhrer Is Sleeping Late This Morning
Hogan, by All The "Wules" of Warfare
What do they think will turn up?
All Right, Lady Chitterly
Well, Dash It All
Come On. Use Your Imagination, Crittendon
We've Just Been Talking to London
I have come not to rely desperately on your powers of observation
You Will Make Excellent Cannon Fodder, Klink
Schultz, I Swear to You, I Did Not Touch a Drop
The Mystery Is Solved
Please, Step Inside the Stove
So, Sir Charles
Call Me a Messerschmitt, General
If the Mission Is Such a Crackerjack
I Mean, the Fuhrer, He Doesn't Know Himself
To the Complete and Early Success
What Greetings do you have for me?
Welcome to the Sacred Soil of Our Victorious Fatherland
Klink, We Will Have Schnapps
Remember that Klink!
Is This the Uniform of the Day, Klink?
So, This Is the Way You Receive
And What You May Have Forgotten,Hogan, Is That I Rank You
Don't call us, we'll call you
Crittendon, You May Be Right
I'm your man bing bang bing
He just happens to look like you
Hogan, This Is Most Irregular
What Time's This General Von Schlomm arrive?
Where Is Newkirk?
What, have you gone around the bend?
So, He's a Pretty Big Fish
And a gweat big kiss for Eva!
Sergeant Schultz, Your Excellency
Delighted to See You, Dear Boy
That would mean I would have to die first
All Right, Then Charge Him 500 Marks
Hogan, This Is All New to Me
Finding beauty in the squalor of camp
There's Something Else You Won't Believe
You've indicated the infinity of space with two circles
That Isn't a Doodle; That's a Work of Art
What's Going on Here?!
Lebeau Cooked the Squab Lorraine
Oh, That's Only Some Scribblings
Now I Want You to Order the Men
Don't Tell Anybody Else, Huh?
I'll Tell What We'll Do, Schultz
There isn't enough for company
Ah, Come on, Schultz
Well, That Just Looks Like an Ordinary Pigeon to Me
You Know, It's Too Bad Alberta Isn't a Parrot
You Know, if Everybody in the Underground
I'm Just Keeping in Practice for After the War
When Will These Lips Be Able to Say What's in My Heart?
Look, Metzler, Why Can't You Understand?
Thought I'd Done Everything in This War
Schultz, Get Me Another Car, Will You?
What were you doing out of the barracks?
Oh, You're a Naughty Boy Sir
It's a lonely war, Schultz
Is That Bloody All?
Perhaps We Could Get Gracie Fields to Fly Over
We're Stationed at Stalag 13
I'd like to resign from this conversation
There's No Shortage of Birds in Hammelburg
These Guys Were Into Something
Somebody Wanted These Guys Put on Ice
I Don't Know Anything
Boy, You Germans Can't Get Together on Anything
A Lot of Work to Do
I can answer this question with a question
Can't you look at me?
My Instinct Tells Me There's Something Rotten in Germany..
We Don't Have Any Trigger-Happy Guards Here
Nice of Him
If You Don't Like That Crime
Keep the Motor Running, Huh?
Sometime we'll make love in a general's car
Don't Worry About Inconveniencing Me
Love Goes out the window
What's Our Next Job, Colonel?
Very Simple, Colonel, Replace Me
Colonel Klink, You're Too Kind
When You Want a Favor, Commandant, You're Irresistible
Release the Prisoner to Sergeant Duclos
Perhaps I Should Call Berlin
If You're Ever in Trouble, Call Stalag 13
Carter Should Have Learned to Cook by Now
He can hide in a potato peel
Wait a Minute, You're Not the Little Frenchman
This Is Terrible
Don't Forget to Write In Code
Another thing to charge to the war
C'est La Guerre
You Have to Use the Seasoning
Louis, I'll Never Learn About French Cooking
Everybody has bad days
I Could Order You to Stay, Lebeau
Oh, Come on, Louis, You Know You'll Miss Us
You Off to England Then, Marie?
Yeah, How Would Klink Look
He's Given Us Good Intelligence Before
I Risk My Life for the Fatherland
It loses a little something in the translation
These French are so emotional
Hogan's Heroes - Season 6