Ask your boss if he wants me shot up before we talk.

Anyway, he's made to order for the part. Look at him. Let's give him to them.

All right. I've got another suggestion. It may not be as good as the first one, but it's better than nothing.

And at that juncture, you decided to slip me a mickey, huh?

And sure enough while she was asking us who we were through the door and we were telling her, we heard a window go up.

All right, Tommy, take us into the black hole.

All right, you've had your little joke. Now tell us about it.

Cairo: Are you going? Gutman: 17 years I've wanted that little item and I've been trying to get it. We must spend another year on the quest.

Gutman: Wilmer? Sam: Ha ha ha! A swell lot of thieves. Gutman: You've little enough to boast about, sir. The world hasn't come to an end just because we've run into a little setback.

And to you, Miss O'Shaughnessy, I leave the rara avis on the table there as a little memento.

Albert, aren't you getting out?

A wand was taken from you upon your arrival at the Ministry today. Is this that wand?

And it's, like, nailed the atmosphere at mark 15, which, you guys know, is pretty unstable, obviously, so we're gonna help Laredo guide it on the vox ultra-frequency carrier and use Roman candles for visual confirmation.

Another shipmate! Yes, the more, the merrier!

Actually, I'm highly logicaI, which allows me to look past extraneous detail......and perceive clearly that which others overlook.

And you knew you needed another protector, somebody to fill Thursby's boots, so you came back to me.

And it happens we're in the detective business. Well, when one of your organization gets killed, it's bad business to let the killer get away with it.

Flint: All right, Mr.Bile, is it? Bile: Uh... my friends call me Phlegm.

Mike: And, uh... how is Georgie doing? Charlie: He's doing great!

Hans: Ach. Don't be silly. Frieda: Don't be silly? I've seen these womens making eyes at my Hans.

Cleopatra: Ha. Hans: Are you laughing at me? Cleopatra: Why, no, monsieur.

Mike: A door?! Sully: Randall was in it. Mike: Wait a minute. Randall? That cheater! He's trying to boost his numbers!

As long as it doesn't come near us we're going to be okay.

Are you sleepy? You want to sleep? Is that what you want? Huh?

All right, y'all, God bless you. I gotta get out of here and catch this flight, all right? Y'all take care. Catch the next album.

And don't you come around crying tonight, trying to get back in!

A free travel coupon won't help me get to my meeting on time, now will it?

All right, I'll see you on the other side.

Accidents happen. You think I didn't exhaust every other option?

Aw, p-phooey.

Am I too late for Alexander's panic attack? Apparently not.

All you had to do was listen to me, just once!

Ah, poor guy. I understand. It ain't easy being banished.

Ah, it won't be so hard for you guys, though, you know. I mean, how lucky can you get? Banished with your best friend.

Mike: All right, come on, over the plate. Let's see the ol' stuff here, pal. Come on, now, chuck him, chuck him, baby. Hum, baby. Hum, baby, here's the pitch. Randall: Wait, please, don't, don't, don't! No! Mike: And he is... out of here!

Another gator?! Give me that shovel! Come here!

Ah, Boo, it's been fun. Go ahead. Go grow up.

Ah, sure, we put the factory in the toilet, and... gee, hundreds of people will be out of work now.

As we were leaving Godric's Hollow, I cast a curse and it rebounded. I'm sorry.

Accio sword.

Harry: And you cast the doe as well, did you? Ron: No, I thought that was you. Harry: No, my Patronus is a stag. Ron: Right. Yeah. Antlers.

Ain't it cute?

Always I should have known you would only laugh at me.

Hercules: Ah, your imagination's getting the best of you. Venus: Yeah, maybe it is, but coppers don't have imaginations, so I've been told.

It was the book my father used to read to me when I was sick, and I used to read it to your father. And today, I'm gonna read it to you.

Grandson: Does it got any sports in it? Grandpa: Are you kidding? Fencing, fighting, torture, revenge, giants, monsters, chases, escapes, true love, miracles.

What is this? Are you tryin' to trick me? And, where's the sports? Is this a kissing book?

And you! Friendless. Brainless. Helpless! Hopeless!

Are you the sort of man who would put the poison into his own goblet or his enemy's?

Now, a clever man would put the poison into his own goblet because he would know that only a great fool would reach for what he was given.

Buttercup: To think. All that time it was your cup that was poisoned. Westley: They were both poisoned. I spent the last few years building up an immunity to iocane powder.

As you wish!

All right, so we got less than 90 minutes. We've already lost over 50 people and that's including an FBI agent.

Buttercup: Any word from Westley? Humperdink: Too soon, my angel. Patience. Buttercup: He will come for me.

Humperdink: And then my ears. I understand. Let's get on with it. Westley: Wrong! Your ears you keep, and I'll tell you why.

Faye: And she looks at herself? Megan: Yes, she does.

Actually, I don't know what he noticed, but it wasn't me, I guess.

And I just kept thinking, "Why does he stare at other girls?"

My mother was a nurse at the state hospital in Vermont and that was the last time I saw so many retarded people in one building.

Are you and Daddy doing it?

And who knows who he had watching her? Some secretary, another whore?

Apparently they symbolize death.

Don: Hello? Betty: Am I catching you alone? Don: What do you want?

A man is shamed by being openly ridiculed and rejected. It requires an audience.

And when I drop them off I feel relieved. And then I miss them.

Armor almost gone, Jason!

Are you thanking me or reprimanding me?

At the zoo, do elephants throw you peanuts?

Asshole never lets me hear the end of it.

All right, brace yourselves, you guys, this is it.

You, spend too much money? No. A lot of people go to Switzerland to get their watch fixed.

At the bank, do I tell Mrs. Bollinger, "Here's one big bastard of a check. Give me some of your Christing money"?

All right, dinner's at 7:00. Well, he's outside.

And just remember, the best thing about kids is making 'em.

...And to make sure that two regular schmoes like you and me never get a date with girls like Valerie Desmond.

Jason: Dad, last semester I got nothing but Cs. Thornton: A, B, C... you're in the top 3. What are you worrying about?

And the business of an educational institution such as ours is to create young minds that understand that the business of America is the kind of business that it actually is.

And the reason guys like you got a place to teach is 'cause guys like me donate buildings.

The world's oldest living freshman and the walking epitome of the decline of modern education.

...And take it apart brick by brick and nuke them back into the fuckin' stone age forever? How come? Tell me? Why? Say it! Say it!

Dr. Diane Turner: ..And his heart was going like mad, and yes, I said, yes, I will, yes. Thornton: Yes! Yes!

Diane: Are you jealous of Thornton Melon? Dr. Barbay: ...Certainly not.

A merger, exactly. Exactly, a merger. A partnership. Seriously, Diane, we're both intelligent, well educated adults.

A lot of people are talking about your dad, man.

You know we're pointing out that a violent ground acquisition game such as football is, in fact, a crypto fascist metaphor for nuclear war.

And also, bring a pitcher of beer every 7 minutes till somebody passes out. And then bring one every 10 minutes, all right?

And as soon as the road to the hospital is open, they'll send an ambulance for you.

Paul: Annie, in 1871, women often died in childbirth. But her spirit is the important thing, and Misery's spirit is still alive. Annie: I don't want her spirit! I want her! And you murdered her!

And don't even think about anybody coming for you... not the doctors, not your agent, not your family... Because I never called them.

According to the check on Sheldon's credit charges, there's nothing after the Silver Creek.

Annie: After all, writers do need a place to work. Paul: Work? You mean write? What in the world do you think I'd write?

Anything else I can get while I'm in town? Any other crucial requirements that need satisfying?

Are you sure? Because if you want, I'll bring back the whole store for you.

Paul: Annie... What's the matter? Annie: What's the matter?! I'll tell you what's the matter!

Almost done. Just one more.

It was Christmas Eve, and all the children were in high spirits.

Hermione: And how is it that you just happen to have the sword of Gryffindor? Harry: It's a long story.

A voice......your voice, Hermione......coming out of it.

Hermione: And what exactly did I say, may I ask? Ron: My name. Just my name. Like a whisper.

And sure enough, it floated toward me, the ball of light......went right to my chest, straight through me. Right here.

And I knew it was gonna take me where I needed to go, so I Disapparated......and came to this hillside. It was dark. I had no idea where I was.

But that night, another wizard stole the wand......and slit the brother's throat for good measure. And so Death took the first brother for his own.

Another shipmate!

Annie: And you need one glass of champagne; Dom Perig-non. Paul: Dom Perig-non it is.

And because of you, I get my astronomy homework done for me by NASA.

Huh? I'll give you an idea what I mean. My two boys I put one through college and the other I put through a wall.

They want me to take oral exams in all my subjects. If I don't take them, they'll kick me out. And if I take 'em, who knows where they'll kick me.

And I'm really in love with you, and I really have been for a very long time. And I can't believe I'm saying this.

A word of advice. You want to pull a scam, don't make your wife a partner. And if you do... Don't fuck around behind her back.

Jason: Aaahhh! Dad, uh... what are you doing here? Thornton: I'm robbing your room! That's what I'm doing here.

Dean Martin: Are you comfortable? Thornton: Oh, I'm fine, yeah... Oh, the chair! Oh, I'm sorry.

Trent: An effect? Like what? Styles: Well, disorientation, memory loss, severe paranoid reaction. Trent: People pay money to feel like that? It's cute. Put it in the press kit.

As for the third brother......Death searched for many years but was never able to find him.

A reality is just what we tell each other it is. Sane and insane could easily switch places, if the insane were to become the majority. You would find yourself locked in a padded cell, wondering what happened to the world.

Lou, I can't believe it. Married 5 years. Seems like yesterday. And you know what a lousy day yesterday was.

Jason: Yeah, and they already been underlined, too. Get it? Thornton: That's the problem. The last guy who underlined them, he could have been a maniac! Hey, get these guys some new books. Huh? Get some new books, will ya?

And I can't even spot how you're cheatin'.

All right, here's your keys, your rental agreement, complimentary map of Boston.

Hey, guys, anybody know a nice restaurant, like something where they give out free bubblegum in the bathrooms?

John, look, don't you think after four years maybe she's hoping for something more than dinner?

A professional NFL player is called upon to save the world.

Teddy: Turkey burgers. Are we having homosexuals over for dinner tonight? Lori: Ha-ha. No, just you homos.

A couple of Charles Brew-kowskis?

Accident, my deep blue eyes.

...And if I can remember what you had, I'll die a happy man.

Cassidy: Alright. I'll jump first. Kid: No. Cassidy: Then you jump first. Kid: No, I said.

Yeah, and if a frog had wings, it wouldn't bump its ass a-hoppin'.

Ed: All babies are beautiful. Hi: This one's awful damn good, though. Ed: Don't you cuss around him.

Adam Sandier plays a guy and his sister, and it's just awful. It's unwatchable. But, they're hookers, so it's fine.

All right, Buzz, that's enough of that.

Ted: Uh-huh. And if I don't get the job, are we still going to smoke that pot? John: Probably, yes.

...And the only excitement I've known is here with me now. So I'll go with you, and I won't whine.

....And I'll sew your socks, and I'll stitch you when you're wounded. And I'll do anything you ask of me except one thing.

Cassidy: All Bolivia can't look like this. Kid: How do you know? This might be the garden spot of the whole country.

...And, you, your job is to shut up.

And some say that it's the Bandidos Yanquis.

All right, Kareem!

Are you out here all alone?

And you are all mouth.

Actually, a crowd offers remarkable anonymity.

Okay. All right, Tami, come on, honey. Let's get out of here. We'll go back to my place for a couple of vodka and strawberry Quiks.

Ah, the open sea. Oh, god, wish I could smell. I had my nostrils fried in Panmunjom.

John: Are you going to do it? Sam: I'm going to punch through it.

All I do is smoke pot and watch movies with a teddy-fucking-bear. Because of that, I just lost the love of my life.

All I wanted was a sweet distraction for an hour or two. Had no intention to do.

A man with all the powers of hell at his command. He could turn the day into night.

Older FBI Agent: Any disgruntled employees? Nathan Arizona: They're all disgruntled. I ain't running a damn daisy farm.

Goddammit! Are you boys gonna chase down your leads or are you gonna sit around drinking coffee in the one house in the state where I know my boy ain't at?

Australia.

Kid: It's a long way, though, isn't it? Cassidy: Aw! Everything's got to be perfect with you. Kid: I just don't want to get there and find out it stinks. That's all.

Cassidy: At least think about it. Kid: All right... I'll think about it.

A friend of mine just sold some reefer to Matt Reynolds. He's tripping the light fantastic with Tammy Jordan.

Adrian!

Reporter: Aren't you a little young to be watch commander? Ed: It's only for tonight. The married men have Christmas eve off.

At least get rid of the glasses. I can't think of a single man in the bureau who wears them.

A veteran like Vincennes might be willing to admit his own culpability, but he'd never rat out a fellow officer.

Ace 'em at the grand jury tomorrow, son.

A duty few men are fit for, but you were born for.

Are you Pierce Patchett?

Oh, are you soliciting for police charities? Last time, you called at my office.

Are you concerned about criminal matters peripheral to the Nite Owl murders?

Smith: A night's stewing ought to have softened them up. Ed: Oh, I'll break them, sir.

Jack: Are you sure golden boy's up to the task, cap? Smith: Oh, I think you'd be surprised what the lad is capable of.

A naked guy with a gun, you expect anyone to believe that?

As though the badge of honor would touch that guy with a 10-foot pole after he's been hush-hush cover boy twice in one year.

All they get is Veronica Lake. I get Lynn Margaret Bracken.

And you, my lovely......what do they call you?

Ah. Got you.

...And it will be a very long time before someone inspires us the way he did.

A lot o' loyalty for a hired gun!

CIA Agent: At least you can talk. Who are you? Bane: It doesn't matter who we are...

A thug who showed his true nature... when he betrayed the trust of this great man... and murdered 'im in cold blood.

Although you don't have the long nails or... the facial scars, sir.

All he found was rodents.

All right, college boy, I'll help, but there's a case you boys in homicide don't care about.

How would a 2-bit hick like Meeks get his hands on a large supply of heroin?

A hooker cut to look like Lana Turner is still a hooker.

All those horrible, slimy things... Trying to get back in? They're all true.

Always looking for the con. Even now you're trying to rationalize.

When you and Dent cleaned up the streets, you cleaned them good. And pretty soon we'll be chasing down, uh, overdue library books.

At this point, I'd set you up with a chimpanzee, if it brought you back to the world.

And I wanted something more for you than that. I still do.

And if I go get a warrant for the investigation of Harvey Dent's murder? That still count as unscheduled?

And then they want the angry little kid to do something he knows he can't do. Move on.

...and not much of any use in your elbows or your shoulders. Between that and the scar tissue on your kidneys...

And now there's evil rising from where we tried to bury it.

Paparazzi #1: Who's that? Paparazzi #2: Another stiff can barely climb out of his sports car. Paparazzi #1: No, that's Bruce Wayne!

Miranda: Actually, this is my party, Mr. Wayne. Bruce: Oh.

Miranda: And the proceeds will go where they should, because I paid for the big fat spread myself. Bruce: That's very generous of you.

...And isn't so wounded when it fails... that he goes into hiding.

Actually, I could operate without my hands. Dr. Greenbaum could be my hands. I could tell him what to do, and he'd do it for me. You would get a chance see me in action.

After I guide Dr. Greenbaum through an operation I get very depressed. I couldn't do it myself. You know, It's a very bad time for me.

And it takes me about 20 minutes to get a fucking beer.

A disgrace as a police officer. Straight "D" fitness reports from every C.O. He ever served under.

Although he was found in Echo Park, preliminary forensics indicates the body was most likely moved.