"I ran for President to help hardworking families succeed and to stand up for the embattled middle class."
Chirped by @LordGiraldus
"This just in, Tiger Woods is back in the hospital. Apparently just hours after a press conference where he confessed to multiple transgressions, Woods had an accident in his home where he fell down a flight of stairs, then inadvertently threw himself through a plate glass window."
"Tiger Woods back in the hospital after being accidently hit by his own car. An incredible development in an amazing story."
Brittany Murphy: "I'm really honored to be here hosting Saturday Night Live." Seth: "No, Brittany, you're not hosting." Brittany Murphy: "Yeah."
Chirped by @LordGiraldus
Chirped by @LordGiraldus
"I have to lay down and put my head between my legs."
Chirped by @GSMichelleCS
"Boy, it looks like that Tiger Woods is having some trouble, huh?"
It does make a considerable difference to me having someone with me on whom I can thoroughly rely.
Guy: The witness stated that he saw Lord Blackwood rise from the grave. Man: I want you to find him and stop him. Sherlock: That would take every ounce of my not inconsiderable experience.
Chirped by @LordGiraldus
Irene: He's just as brilliant as you are. And infinitely more devious. Sherlock: We'll see about that.
Watson: I never complain, when do I complain about you practicing your violin at 3 in the morning, your general lack of hygiene or your expiriment on my dog. Lady: He's killed the dog, again.
Holmes!
Watson: Holmes, leve the case alone. Sherlock: Case re-opened.
"I have to say he was really good."
Woman: Who else did you fuck? Is that it? Holly Sampson: Um, I’m trying to think of whom else. Um, I’ve had…Tiger Woods. Woman: You fucked Tiger Woods! Holly Sampson: I fucked Tiger Woods dude. Woman: How did that happen? Holly Sampson: Well a friend of mine, Brent Boathouse, he runs a lot of…you know Brent? Woman: ...
"So part of our challenge is reconciling these two seemingly irreconcilable truths - that war is sometimes necessary, and war is at some level an expression of human folly."
"Let me begin by acknowledging the hard truth."
Chirped by @LordGiraldus
"Let me make one final point about the use of force. Even as we make difficult decisions about going to war, we must also think clearly about how we fight it. The Nobel Committee recognized this truth in awarding its first prize for peace to Henry Dunant - the founder of the Red Cross, and a driving force behind the...
Oh yes Happy Hanukah You'all
A few weeks ago he asked me to text him a naked photo of myself. I mean at first I was like what? no way, I don't let anyone see me naked. I mean I don't even let my dogs watch me undress. But he promised he wouldn't show it to anyone and I love him so I did it.
"No his girls are busted. I don't understand. If I'm gonna sleep with 29,000 chicks, trust me we're going to be doing some Miss Venezuela's, you know what I mean. Let's take the game up. At least let wifey hit you with a golf club and she be like that bitch was beautiful, you know what I mean. She's mad at you becau...
Chirped by @LordGiraldus
Chirped by @SwitchingGranny
Chirped by @SwitchingGranny
Chirped by @LordGiraldus
Chirped by @LordGiraldus
Chirped by @LordGiraldus
Chirped by @LordGiraldus
Chirped by @LordGiraldus
Chirped by @LordGiraldus
Grace: "How much training have you had?" Jake Sully: "I dissected a frog once."
Chirped by @LordGiraldus
Woman: Honey, can you open this jar of pickles for me? Man: Sure but I’m going to need a hand job first. Woman: Okay. Announcer: Introducing Hand Job. The revolutionary multi-grip system everybody is talking about. Having trouble getting your motor started? All strain and no gain in the garage? Are your golden year...
But then there was that fear that came over your species, unlike anything ever before seen among the rest of us creatures of God. A fear of uncertainty, quite strange. For we think it joyful to not know what the future will bring, and believing in higher forces that really ARE good and loving, we expect to be loved ...
Have yourself a merry little Christmas Let your heart be light From now on, our troubles will be out of sight So have yourself a merry little Christmas night Here as in olden days Happy golden days of yours Faithful who are dear to us Gather near to us once more Through the years we all will be together I...
Hey, maybe I'll dye my hair Maybe I'll move somewhere Maybe I'll get a car Maybe I'll drive so far They'll all lose track Me, I'll bounce right back Maybe I'll sleep real late Maybe I'll lose some weight Maybe I'll clear my junk Maybe I'll just get drunk on apple wine Me, I'll be just Fine and Dandy ...
Chirped by @GSMichelleCS
Chirped by @LordGiraldus
Chirped by @LordGiraldus
"I tell you most kids with his background wouldn't come within 200 miles of this place."
Girl: "Who is the big guy eating with your little brother?" Collins: "It's his big brother."
"You will be haunted by 3 spirits."
Chirped by @LordGiraldus
Girls: Here you are free and you have pride. Guys: Long as you stay on your own side. Girls: Free to be anything you choose. Guys: Free to wait tables and shine shoes.
Hey, I got a social disease.
When you were here before, Couldn't look you in the eye You're just like an angel, Your skin makes me cry You float like a feather In a beautiful world I wish I was special You're so fuckin' special But I'm a creep, I'm a weirdo What the hell am I doin' here? I don't belong here I don't care if it hurts, I wanna ...
Christmas time, Christmas time, Drinking cocoa by the fire place, Jesus is your lord and savior, Christmas time, Christmas time, We’re gonna celebrate it at Grandma’s place, She is super into Jesus,
Health care reform -- will it happen now or never? Democrat Barney Frank takes on Republican Ron Paul and Ben Stein!
"I paid hush money to my ex-girlfriends husband."
"Hold on tight."
Chirped by @LordGiraldus
Chirped by @LordGiraldus
The comedian's afraid of germs and it's no joke. Find out how obsessive-compulsive disorder rules his life!
Chirped by @LordGiraldus
Chirped by @LordGiraldus
Chirped by @LordGiraldus
Chirped by @CJKMerriman
Chirped by @LordGiraldus
"Thanks for listening, and on behalf of Michelle, Malia, Sasha, and Bo, happy holidays, from our family to yours."
"Jersey Shore in which 8 Italian American 20 something's share a beach house for the summer. Here to discuss it is Jersey Shore's cast member Nicole 'Snooki' Polizzi."
"Hi America, it's me your girl Snooki. Woo!"
"Have a nice day."
Chirped
Chirped by @LordGiraldus
A biologist reflects on an awe-inspiring experience in Africa, when a group of baboons united in some kind of amazing "mystical" moment.
Chirped by @LordGiraldus
So this is Xmas And what have you done Another year over And a new one just begun And so this is Xmas I hope you have fun The near and the dear one The old and the young A very Merry Xmas And a happy New Year Let's hope it's a good one Without any fear And so this is Xmas For weak and for strong For rich and the p...
"Hang those stockings up, this sleigh is real!"
"Happy new year."
Holiday cards can be a great way to keep in touch with friends and relatives, but there are some people in your life that honestly shouldn't make the list. Rob talks to his friend mommylite blogger Sarah Maizes about how she came to the decision to leave one former friend off her card list this year.
Chirped by @SFXsourceSounds
Chirped by @LordGiraldus
Chirped by @love_claire
Chirped by @LordGiraldus
"He's saying "D'oh!" "D'oh!" "D'oh!" "D'oh!" "D'oh!""
"Adama, Oo-oo-oo-oooo, You're Olmos the man we need. If President Roslin puts you in detention, Carry on, carry on, 'cause you're really hot for teacher."
"Hera is, two years old, took a little stroll."
Chirped by @DaveMyers1
Chirped by @LordGiraldus
"Holmes!"
Jake: "Hello Jane, Adam."
"I've never really known how to live without you."
"You haven't seen anything yet."
"Speaking of doctors, this female benefactor is being shown around the hospital by the dotr and they say look into one of the patient’s rooms. They both to the horror of the female benefactor see this male patient furiously masturbating. And the woman says to the doctor, oh my God what’s going on there? The doctor s...
Chirped by @peterdickson
"Holy shit!"
"Hail to the king baby."
"Holy cow."