If you can spare something, I can work for you in any way. I know I'll keep moving, before long, to get back to Fond du Lac.

Daniel: I'd just like to hear you say you'd like to be here. Henry: I'd like to be here.

I'm a good worker. I worked cable tool rigs, built railroads. I won't need any favors.

I worked for Geological Survey and went to Kansas. I couldn't stay there. I just couldn't.

I have a competition in me. I want no one else to succeed.

Henry: I'll leave, Daniel. Daniel: Who are you? Henry: I'm no one.

I met a man in King City who said he was your brother. We were friends for months.

It's your only way to salvation. And your only way for what you want. You can take it at the Church of the Third Revelation.

Daniel: I'll pay you $3,000. William: I'd like you to be part of our church. Daniel: I'll pay you $5,000.

Eli: I truly wish everyone could be saved, don't you? Church Congregation: Yes. Eli: I am afraid that's just not the case.

Daniel: I've abandoned my child! I've abandoned my boy! Eli: Now beg for the blood!

I love you very much. I've learned to love what I do because of you.

I'm leaving here. I'm going to Mexico. I'm taking Mary, and I'm going to Mexico.

It'll only be for a time, for me to do my own drilling and start my own company.

It's the truth. You're not my son. You never have been. You're an orphan!

I can't get Jurassic Park back online without Dennis Nedry.

Eli: I am a false prophet, and God is a superstition. If that's what you believe, then I will say it. Daniel: Say it like you mean it.

Eli: I am a false prophet. God is a superstition. Daniel: Why don't you stand up?

Eli: I am a false prophet! God is a superstition! Daniel: Say it again. Eli: I am a false prophet! God is a superstition!

I paid him $10,000 cash in hand. Just like that. He has his own company now. Prosperous little business. Three wells producing, $5,000 a week.

I am the Third Revelation! I am the Third Revelation! I told you I would eat you.

I threw up.

Grant: It's just like coming out of a tree house. Your dad ever build you a tree house? Tim: No. Grant: Yeah, me, too.

Muldoon: I think this was Gennaro. Ellie: I think this was too.

I hate climbing. I hate trees, way too high.

Peter: It's called the hula. Liz: Luau? Peter: No, hula. Brian: You're doing a luau? A luau-lu.

Peter: It's delicious, though, thank you. Matthew: I'll just go fuck myself. Peter: Sorry, what? Matthew: Mahalo.

I'd like to dedicate this song to a very beautiful woman that's here today. It's Miss Sarah Marshall, there she is.

I heard about it everybody. You gotta stop talking about it.

It's like The Sopranos. It's over. Find a new show.

Kemo: I'm prepping the pig for tomorrow's luau. You should come and help me. It'll take your mind off of things. Peter: Yeah? You don't mind? Kemo: No.

I mean, I must say I'm a pretty good cook.

Three weeks later, I caught him cheating on me, so I moved out, and that's that.

It's an impact tremor, is what it is. I'm fairly alarmed here.

Rachel: I'm just saying, if you hate something, change it. Don't dwell. Peter: Well, I'm trying.

I'm actually working on a rock opera.

I have this vision of doing it with puppets. I mean, humans also, you know.

Rachel: My ex. If I run, you run. Do you understand? Peter: No, I don't understand at all.

Tim: I hate trees! Lex: They don't bother me. Tim: Oh yeah? Well, you weren't in the last one!

Lex: What are you and Ellie gonna do now if you don't have to pick up dinosaur bones anymore? Grant: I don't know. I guess... I guess we'll just have to evolve too.

I had a wee trapeze and a merry-go-round carousel...

With this place, I wanted to show them something that wasn't an illusion.

Rachel: I can't believe I ever dated him. Peter: You went nuts. Rachel: Yeah. Peter: You guys are dysfunctional.

Rachel: From what? Peter: You were. 'I'll kill you. I'll kill you.'

Keoki took it, right there. And I asked him to take it down, but he said that it would ruin the balance of the collage.

It's getting kind of hard to believe things are going to get better

I've been drowning too long to believe that the tide's going to turn.

And I've been living too hard to believe things are going to get easier now.

I'm still trying to shake off the pain from the lessons I've learned.

It was a date, okay? Trust me.

Peter: I know a date, and that was a date. Dwayne: I bet you think strippers like you, too. Peter: That's really not necessary.

Let me just say that if God was a city planner, he would not put a playground next to a sewage system.

We're just, like I'm stabbing her private parts, and it's not fun, and it causes anxiety.

I like her hair. I wonder if the carpet matches her pubes.

Information, please. What?

I'll serenade you every night in front of thousands of women.

It's like an 18-month tour, 43 countries, Infant Sorrow, and it's gonna be a massive tour.

Sarah: Yeah. I can't come 'cause I have a job. I'm a working actress. Aldous: Not any more. You're an unemployed actress, perfect.

I think, remember what Sarah said before, these plants make it so the animals won't even know you're here.

Well, look, you know, I've not told you I've got genital herpes, because it's not inflamed at the moment.

Kelly: I remember all the stories you told. Ian: Oh, no, no. This is nothing like that. We're in a completely different situation right now.

All right, so I came here to give you my demo. I just I worship you, and I just wanted to give you my demo.

'And I totally was wrong, because he's a major, major, major influence on me now, and I feel terrible.'

I'll listen to it when you've gone.

Sarah: Peter, I got some really interesting news this morning. Peter: Aldous gave you gonorrhoea?

Peter: It's great to have a steady paycheck. It's, I'm very lucky. Rachel: Oh, my God, you hate it. I fucking hate it so much.

Sarah: I didn't know you were going on tour. Aldous: Yeah, I'm going in two weeks.

I'm feeling luckier than you. Glad to not have to sit through a Celine Dion concert.

I don't know if I can be with somebody who doesn't like animals and thinks I'm a mental person.

I love you, Binky... but I don't have to like you right now.

I'm not a rage-o-holic!

Andie: I say bullshit. Jack: Mm-hmm. What did she say? I didn't quite hear. Did you guys...? I didn't hear what she said. What did you say? Andie: I said bullshit!

I'm Lieutenant Colonel Podovsky. I do not know who you are yet, but I will.

I see you are no stranger to pain. Perhaps you have been among my Vietnamese comrades before.

It seems you were abandoned on direct command. And these are the people you protect with your pain.

If your life means nothing to you, then perhaps his does.

I swear to god, I didn't know it was supposed to happen like this.

Mike: I was just lying there and trying to sleep, and... you know that... that perfume you sprayed on my pillow? Michelle: Oh, yeah. Mike: Well, that smell is gone now, and, uh... Michelle, I-I want it back.

I don't wanna step out of the spotlight and then be forgotten.

I don't wanna disappear. I'm freaked out.

I wanna be honest. I'm really freaked out right now, okay?

Ben: I think you're running away. Andie: Why don't you save your mind games for your next bet, okay? I am not running away.

Sarah: How are you? Peter: I'm screwed.

I'll be fine. I've been quietly stealing money from you for a long time.

It's not going to crack this guy. I mean, this is Defcon Five.

I want to please my wife here, on our honeymoon, but I don't know what I'm doing.

If you can involve the anus in that, then that's absolute perfection.

I don't know if you want, instead of Lazy Joe's. I was thinking of going to Laie Point right now.

It is sea turtle fucking season, dude. Let's go. They fuck for three hours, dude. I mean, that's magical.

I don't think I've ever been this covered in sweat before. It's like I have some sort of fever.

Peter: I just don't feel like doing anything. Rachel: Why? Peter: 'Cause my heart is broken, and I can't imagine doing anything right now.

I can see your vagina from here.

I can see your hoo-ha.

I mean, I'll jump.

If you fall straight down, you'd probably hit a rock and kill yourself.

I was there. I witnessed it.

Peter: It was the only room available. Sarah: I'm sure it was.

Chuck: I don't think you're ready yet, man. Peter: I'm ready to ride giants, Koonu. Chuck: I think you're ready.

I'm just drifting around, you know? Getting in touch with the ocean and stuff. It's really pleasant.

I was listening to Sarah's iPod the other day, and amidst the interminable dross that's on that.

It's so hard to say, because, like, I hate you in so many ways, but whatever. I can see why Sarah likes you.

I'm really sorry. I apologize for offending you, Peter.

I just hope this doesn't ruin our friendship.

Peter: I kind of have this thing about blood, okay? Aldous: Look at it. It's raping my leg. Peter, get it out of my fucking leg, please.

I am gonna miss you like crazy.

I'm just an easy cry, that's all.

I have to have it quiet when I do my illusions.

I'll get you for this one, doc.

I just can't wait for the other surprises he's got planned. Whoopee cushions, exploding cigars.

I need to understand what I did to make you cheat.

I tried to get you out of the house. I tried to get you off your little island you loved so much, the couch.

I tried really hard. I promise you that. I just didn't have it in me.

Peter: I think if you had just, maybe tried harder. Sarah: Oh, I tried.

I talked to a therapist.

I talked to my mother. I read every book possible.

I admire Sir Tommy Bahama an awful lot. He's a talented man, but tonight, I feel that this is appropriate.

INFLA

I have a little dignity. And I don't have the frame... to support plastic surgery. I would tip over.

And I'm not gonna do that. I'm not gonna exploit myself.

Peter: I would really love to get the woman's perspective on the matter. Liz: Really? Peter: No.

I am so sorry. I never thought in a million years she would say yes.

It's a metaphor for addiction to technology.

It's a metaphor for a crap movie.

I found one track that I quite liked.

You know what? If they were Sean John sweatpants, it would have been fine. But because they're Costco brand, it's like the worst thing I could do.

I'm sorry that I didn't end up being who we thought I was gonna be, you know?

I took love seminars. I took sex seminars. None of it worked. None of it made a difference to you.

I was actually meaning to ask you, what did you exactly think of my demo? Did you get it? Did you get it?

Oh, no. I was gonna listen to that, but then I just carried on living my life.

This whole fucking time, I've been trying to get you to come hang out with me. I'm gonna have people fuck with your food the rest of your trip, you fucking dick.

Aldous: It's got us in a terrible situation. Now I'm gonna have to sit with him... wearing this shirt all night. Sarah: You're wearing the shirt regardless.

Peter: I told her that when she read the script. Aldous: Yeah. You were the voice of reason, mate. Peter: I tried to be, but she didn't listen.

I made a mistake coming here with you.

I'll have a little sleep for a few hours, then I'm gonna probably go in the morning, okay?

Peter: I love Hawaii. Rachel: Is it good? Sarah: Yeah, it's nice, but I think for like a week tops.

Sarah: I hate your music. Aldous: Yeah, well, I fucked the housekeeper the other day.

I can't yell right now because I'll get fired. My boss will hear me, and then I won't be able to pay off my student loans.

I actually will not be having an alcoholic beverage this morning.

Peter: First of all, I'm not that kind of guy. And even if I was, I don't think that I have the sexual competency to really pull that off. Aldous: Yeah. It's a gift.

Hey, look at my driver. I'm gonna have sex with her.

I need you to leave.

'Oh, I'm Aldous Snow. Bullshit, bullshit, bullshit, bullshit. 'No, no drinks for me, thanks. 'Bullshit, bullshit, bullshit.'

I love puppets.

I love Fraggle Rock. I love Lamb Chop.

I love Elmo.

Hey, I don't get it. It's just a dead animal, Chewie.

R2, I'm not sure that's such a good idea. It's a very long drop!

Hello, I think. I could be mistaken. They're using a very primitive dialect. I do believe they think I am some sort of god.

C-3PO: I beg your pardon, General Solo, but that just wouldn't be proper. Han Solo: Proper? C-3PO: It's against my programming to impersonate a deity.

I have a really bad feeling about this.

I-I never knew I had it in me.

If I wanted to see you act badly, I'd just watch your TV show, which, obviously, I can't now, because it's been cancelled.

It's so self-loathing go see a psychiatrist. I hate the psychiatrist. Well, go see one anyway. I don't like the psychiatrist.

I'll leave you bleeding in my dungeon! I'll never obey you. I'll rip out your esophagus!

I ain't seen a live man in... In 2 months.

I loves the womens, I surely do, but I swear that a woman's breast is the hardest rock that the almighty ever made on this earth.

Ellie: It's still the flea circus. It's all an illusion. Hammond: When...

I was overwhelmed by the power of this place. But, I made a mistake, too.

I didn't have enough respect for that power, and it's out now.

Grant: It's okay. It's okay. It's a Brachiosaurus. Tim: It's a "Veggiesaurus", Lex. "Veggiesaurus." Lex: Veggie.

I make damn good biscuits!

Lex: I'm a hacker! Tim: That's what I said: you're a nerd. Lex: I am not a computer nerd. I prefer to be called a hacker!

I will call you Caleb. It is a name I've always admired.

I sure will be happy to see my horse again. I hate walking.

I can whip my weight in wolverines!

It's been a long time since I had so much of the English language spoke at me. I ain't used to it.

I'm half horse, half gator, and a touch of the earthquake! I got the prettiest gal, fastest horse, ugliest dog this side of hell!

I've decided that when I depart from this life, I'd like to leave something.

I want to go now.

I bet you'll never look at birds the same way again.

I mean, now, this guy's got some luck.

I'm losing my nerve. I don't even know this guy.

Ellie: Oh God. Muldoon: In the bushes straight ahead. It's all right. Ellie: Like hell it is!

Lex: Timmy, I bet I can climb over the top and get on the other side before you can even get to the top. Tim: What would you give me? Lex: Respect.

I think we're back in business!

It's a UNIX system. I know this.

I only mention it 'cause sometimes there's a man... I won't say a hero. 'Cause what's a hero?

It's gonna cut through the glass!

I Shall Not Walk Alone (by Steve Jones)

I'm coming right back. I give you my word.

I want that money, Lebowski. Bunny says you're good for it.

I'm trying to masturbate!

It's a looter mentality. All you care about is what you can take. You have no rights.

It exists because we made it. We patented it. We own it.

Hammond: I've been present for the birth of every little creature on this island. Malcolm: Surely not the ones that are bred in the wild?

George Jung: I just- I just got released five minutes ago. Diego Delgado: George, are we gonna do this, or not?

Cesar Toban: I demand to know everything. I do not trust $600,000 worth of coca to someone I do not know. George Jung: It's 15 fucking kilos. I piss 15 kilos.

I actually project myself to that place. A little transcendental meditation, if you will.

Kip: I gotta get my tool. Mirror Man: Kip! He ain't bullshittin'.

I have one of yours, you have one of mine. Sounds like an even trade.

I call it "The Stranger." What I do is, I sit on my hand for, like, 15, 20 minutes, until it goes numb.

It's my bag of guns.

Tumbler: It rocks. It's the power move of the new millennium. Toby: "The Stranger," huh?

It's like a little boy's nursery school I've come upon here.

I see two options. You come back with Miguel and my bag of guns, everybody walks.

I heard, back in the day, I mean, way, way, way back in the day, you had, like, antifreeze in them veins. What happened?

If I knew we'd get Glenn back, I might agree. But you think that vato across the way is just gonna hand him over?

I was nobody to Glenn, just some idiot stuck in a tank. He could have walked away, but he didn't. Neither will I.

I see my guns but they're not all in the bag.

I don't think you fully appreciate the gravity of the situation.