Zoolander A Collection by Paramount

About This Collection

Released: 2001-09-28
Zoolander

Zoolander is a 2001 American comedy film directed by and starring Ben Stiller. The film contains elements from a pair of short films directed by Russell Bates and written by Drake Sather and Stiller for the VH1 Fashion Awards television specials in 1996 and 1997. The short films and the movie feature Derek Elijah Zoolander, a dimwitted male model played by Ben Stiller. The film involves Zoolander becoming a pawn in a plot to assassinate the...

Look, Without Derek Zoolander, Male Modeling Wouldn't Be What It Is Today

Look, Without Derek Zoolander, Male Modeling Wouldn't Be What It Is Today

00:04

Donald Trump arrives at the fashion awards show, gives Derek Zoolander some h...

All Right, Now to the Important Stuff. These Ain't No Slashes, Folks

All Right, Now to the Important Stuff. These Ain't No Slashes, Folks

00:09

Lenny Kravitz announces the nominees for Male Model of the Year at the fashio...

I Invented the Piano Key Necktie!

I Invented the Piano Key Necktie!

00:05

Mugatu reminds everyone he is the sole person responsible for inventing the p...

It's Like "Ex-Squeeze" Me, but Have You Ever Heard of Styling Gel?

It's Like "Ex-Squeeze" Me, but Have You Ever Heard of Styling Gel?

00:04

Meekus makes fun of another model, specifically their shortcomings with styli...

I'd Really Like to Continue Talking About This Conversation When I Come Back

I'd Really Like to Continue Talking About This Conversation When I Come Back

00:04

Derek really wants to talk about talking when he gets back from the bathroom.

I Got Two Words For You, Sugar. Zip Disk

I Got Two Words For You, Sugar. Zip Disk

00:06

Maury fires a threat right back at Mugatu, claiming he has all the evidence b...

I Love That Kid. Dumb as a Stump, But I Love Him

I Love That Kid. Dumb as a Stump, But I Love Him

00:04

Maury pours his heart out about how much he loves Derek Zoolander after Derek...

I Am Vile Spew... Of The Wretched Masses

I Am Vile Spew... Of The Wretched Masses

00:12

Mugatu announces the launch of Derelicte to the waiting crowd at the fashion ...

Let's Go! Vagrants and Whores, You're Wanted in Makeup!

Let's Go! Vagrants and Whores, You're Wanted in Makeup!

00:05

Todd shouts out orders to all the filthy people in the fashion show.

In the Computer, It's So Simple

In the Computer, It's So Simple

00:04

Hansel takes a request a little too literally.

Glad You Could Join Us, Kmart

Glad You Could Join Us, Kmart

00:02

Katinka surprises Matilda and gives her a cold welcome with a gun.

We're Not Actually Saying This Is the Earth Calling You, Matilda

We're Not Actually Saying This Is the Earth Calling You, Matilda

00:03

Hansel has to explain his sarcasm to Matilda, because he thinks she doesn't g...

Derek and Matilda Are in Hiding 'Cause Some Dude's Brainwashed Derek

Derek and Matilda Are in Hiding 'Cause Some Dude's Brainwashed Derek

00:05

Hansel tells everyone to help Derek and Matilda hide from Mugatu.

The Winter '95 International Male Catalog

The Winter '95 International Male Catalog

00:19

Hansel finally tells Derek he is the inspiration for becoming a male model.

That's My Sherpa, Lapsang

That's My Sherpa, Lapsang

00:03

Hansel is giving Derek and Matilda a tour of his abode.

Good Luck to You, Derek. I've Always Been a Fan of Blue Steel

Good Luck to You, Derek. I've Always Been a Fan of Blue Steel

00:08

J.P. has some encouraging parting words for Derek and Matilda as gunfire is a...

It's Not Up to You. At the Proper Moment, They'll Trigger You

It's Not Up to You. At the Proper Moment, They'll Trigger You

00:16

JP tries to explain to Derek the danger that is to befall him, and what will ...

Wait a Minute, I Know That Hand

Wait a Minute, I Know That Hand

00:11

Derek notices JP's hand, well-preserved since 1973.

I Deserve to Die if I Can't Even Beat Han-Suck-Ass in a Walk-Off

I Deserve to Die if I Can't Even Beat Han-Suck-Ass in a Walk-Off

00:04

Derek complains to Matilda that he deserves to die for losing.

Thank God I Wore Underwear Today

Thank God I Wore Underwear Today

00:02

Derek thinks to himself that he is happy to have worn underwear at the walk-off.

Age Before Beauty, Goat Cheese

Age Before Beauty, Goat Cheese

00:02

Hansel mocks the fact that Derek is older than him at the walk-off.

Ten Minutes. Old Members Only Warehouse

Ten Minutes. Old Members Only Warehouse

00:05

Hansel challenges Derek to a walk-off at an old warehouse.

Want to Hear an Opinion?

Want to Hear an Opinion?

00:04

Maury Ballstein makes a comment to Matilda about her breasts.

Hmm. I Guess It Would Have to Be the First Time I Went Through the Second Grade

Hmm. I Guess It Would Have to Be the First Time I Went Through the Second Grade

00:04

Derek is conducting an interview with Matilda, reflecting back to when he fir...

Stay The Hell Away From Derek Zoolander

Stay The Hell Away From Derek Zoolander

00:07

Katinka kicks Matilda out of Mugatu's warehouse and warns her never to come b...

In the Good Old Days, Kids as Young as Five Could Work

In the Good Old Days, Kids as Young as Five Could Work

00:10

Mugatu continues to brainwash Derek with videos about child labor laws.

Hey There, Derek. My Name Is Lil' Kleatus

Hey There, Derek. My Name Is Lil' Kleatus

00:08

Mugatu is brain-washing Derek with a video about child labor laws.

The Center Has to Be at Least... Three Times Bigger Than This

The Center Has to Be at Least... Three Times Bigger Than This

00:06

Derek comments that the model he is looking at needs to be larger for the non...

Who Cares About Derek Zoolander Anyway?

Who Cares About Derek Zoolander Anyway?

00:02

Mugatu address the crowd and explains that Derek is completely talentless, wi...

What, Are You Having a Whack Attack?

What, Are You Having a Whack Attack?

00:04

Derek has no clue he has been out of it for a full week, thinking it was a co...

I Invented the Piano Key Necktie! I Invented It!

I Invented the Piano Key Necktie! I Invented It!

00:08

Mugatu asks Derek what he has ever contributed to society.

Doesn't Anyone Notice This? I Feel Like I'm Taking Crazy Pills!

Doesn't Anyone Notice This? I Feel Like I'm Taking Crazy Pills!

00:13

Mugatu is stunned that he is the only person alive who notices Derek has only...

She Was Sandwiched Between The Two Finnish Dwarves and the Maori Tribesman

She Was Sandwiched Between The Two Finnish Dwarves and the Maori Tribesman

00:05

Derek explains to Hansel that he felt a connection with Matilda during the pr...

Did You Ever Think That Maybe There's More to Life

Did You Ever Think That Maybe There's More to Life

00:07

Derek asks a very philosophical question about vanity and life in general.

The Music That He's Created Over the Years, I Don't Really Listen to It

The Music That He's Created Over the Years, I Don't Really Listen to It

00:05

Hansel doesn't have to listen to Sting's music to respect what he has produced.

I Wasn't Like Every Other Kid, You Know, Who Dreams About Being an Astronaut

I Wasn't Like Every Other Kid, You Know, Who Dreams About Being an Astronaut

00:10

Hansel recalls his childhood dreams during an interview.

It Is a Fashion, a Way of Life Inspired by the Very Homeless

It Is a Fashion, a Way of Life Inspired by the Very Homeless

00:10

Mugatu explains the genesis behind Derelicte.

Ow! You Freakin' Idiot!

Ow! You Freakin' Idiot!

00:03

Derek steps on J.P.'s preserved hand and breaks the glass.

Cool Story, Hansel

Cool Story, Hansel

00:05

Hansel tells a story where he thought he was falling off a cliff but he was j...

Now, This'll Be a Straight Walk-Off, Old School Rules

Now, This'll Be a Straight Walk-Off, Old School Rules

00:11

David Bowie gives Derek and Hansel the rules for the walk-off.

You're More Dead To Me Than Your Dead Mother

You're More Dead To Me Than Your Dead Mother

00:09

Derek's father tells him he's dead to him because he's embarrassed that his s...

I Guess I Have A Lot Of Things To Ponder

I Guess I Have A Lot Of Things To Ponder

00:20

Derek loses Male Model of the Year and Hansel catches him staring into a pudd...

The Guy Had to Miraculously Pull His Underwear Out of His Butt Just to Beat You

The Guy Had to Miraculously Pull His Underwear Out of His Butt Just to Beat You

00:04

Matilda tries to comfort Derek after he loses to Hansel in the walk-off.

For Christ's Sake, It's a Casserole, Sheila! It'll Stay!

For Christ's Sake, It's a Casserole, Sheila! It'll Stay!

00:04

Maury's wife gives him a hard time about not being home for dinner when he ca...

Tripping on Acid Changed Our Whole Perspective on Shit

Tripping on Acid Changed Our Whole Perspective on Shit

00:03

Hansel says he's been tripping on acid with his friends and that's why he has...

Hey, Kids, Who Wants To Hear a Story?

Hey, Kids, Who Wants To Hear a Story?

00:04

Derek asks the kids at his center if they want to hear a story.

Promising To Raise The Substandard Minimum Wage, And End Child Labor Once And For All

Promising To Raise The Substandard Minimum Wage, And End Child Labor Once And For All

00:20

A reporter talks about how the Prime Minister of Malaysia is raising the pric...

Deal With That!

Deal With That!

00:02

Hansel helps save the day and does some trash talking.

I'm So Tired! No, Todd, Not Now!

I'm So Tired! No, Todd, Not Now!

00:06

Mugatu yells at Todd because he doesn't want to talk to anyone. Todd tells hi...

It's the Cheryl Ladd Collection, and I Got It At J.C. Penney On Sale

It's the Cheryl Ladd Collection, and I Got It At J.C. Penney On Sale

00:08

Matilda stands over top of Katinka before she knocks her out and tells her wh...

Like a Caterpillar Becomes a Butterfly

Like a Caterpillar Becomes a Butterfly

00:06

Mugatu talks about his new collection called Derelicte that he wants Derek to...

Why You Been Acting So Messed Up Towards Me?

Why You Been Acting So Messed Up Towards Me?

00:24

Matilda brings Derek over to Hansel's to hide out. But, before Hansel allows ...

Prancing Around In Your Underwear With Your Wiener Hanging Out

Prancing Around In Your Underwear With Your Wiener Hanging Out

00:13

Derek tries to tell his dad that he's only wanted to be accepted by him and h...

God? What the Shit Are You Talking About?

God? What the Shit Are You Talking About?

00:05

Derek is upset after losing Male Model of the Year to Hansel and is looking f...

I Can't Sleep With You, Okay? My Head Is Killing Me

I Can't Sleep With You, Okay? My Head Is Killing Me

00:18

Derek misunderstands why Matilda shows up at his door. She's there because he...

Now, if You'll Excuse Me, I've Got an After Funeral Party to Attend

Now, if You'll Excuse Me, I've Got an After Funeral Party to Attend

00:03

Derek tells Matilda he can't give her any more of his time as he has to go to...

What's A While? Like, 8 Days?

What's A While? Like, 8 Days?

00:10

Matilda makes the mistake of telling Hansel and Derek that she hasn't had sex...

I Hear A Lot Of Words Like Beauty And Handsomeness And Incredibly Chiseled Features

I Hear A Lot Of Words Like Beauty And Handsomeness And Incredibly Chiseled Features

00:11

Hansel's video plays for his nomination for Male Model of the Year.

Do as You've Been Trained to Do and Kill the Malaysian Prime Minister!

Do as You've Been Trained to Do and Kill the Malaysian Prime Minister!

00:05

This is part of Mugatu's video that hypnotizes Derek into killing the Prime M...

You Have No Evidence. Han-Stupid Destroyed Everything

You Have No Evidence. Han-Stupid Destroyed Everything

00:04

Mugatu denies the accusation that he's behind the murder attempt of the Prime...

Because I'm A Hand Model, Mama

Because I'm A Hand Model, Mama

00:08

J.P. explains to Matilda and Derek that hand models are smarter than face and...

The Fashion Industry Has Been Behind Every Major Political Assassination

The Fashion Industry Has Been Behind Every Major Political Assassination

01:05

J.P. explains to Matilda and Derek how the fashion industry has been involved...

But, Derek, You Saved The Prime Minister of Malaysia!

But, Derek, You Saved The Prime Minister of Malaysia!

00:12

Derek hops in front of a throwing star that Mugatu tosses at the Prime Minist...

In The Good Old Days, Kids As Young As Five Could Work As They Pleased

In The Good Old Days, Kids As Young As Five Could Work As They Pleased

00:22

Mugatu, dressed up as a little boy brainwashes Derek in a video to kill the P...

Hansel. He's So Hot Right Now. Hansel

Hansel. He's So Hot Right Now. Hansel

00:03

Mugatu comments as Hansel arrives to Derek's friends' funeral.

Rufus, Brint and Meekus Were Like Brothers to Me

Rufus, Brint and Meekus Were Like Brothers to Me

00:34

Derek gives his eulogy for his friends Rufus, Brint and Meekus after they die...

For Christ's Sake, Derek, You've Been Down There One Day

For Christ's Sake, Derek, You've Been Down There One Day

00:16

Derek spends 1 day in the coal mine and complains to his dad that he thinks h...

The Results Are In, Amigo!

The Results Are In, Amigo!

00:11

Hansel wins Male Model of the Year and trash talks Derek as he's staring into...

And the Way Hansel Combs His Hair

And the Way Hansel Combs His Hair

00:31

Meekus and Brint show their intelligence, or lack of, in this argument about ...

What Is This? A Center For Ants?

What Is This? A Center For Ants?

00:32

Derek totally misses Mugatu's point when he shows him a model of the building...

For Serious

For Serious

00:02

Derek tells Matilda he means it when he says he's sorry that models made her ...

Wow, I Could Really Spend The Rest Of My Life With This Woman

Wow, I Could Really Spend The Rest Of My Life With This Woman

00:14

Derek talks to Hansel about the moment he fell in love with Matilda.

Listen to Your Friend Billy Zane

Listen to Your Friend Billy Zane

00:05

Hansel tells Derek to listen to Billy Zane when he tells him to not go throug...

Who Are You Trying to Get Crazy With, Ese?

Who Are You Trying to Get Crazy With, Ese?

00:07

Hansel talks smack to Derek after he challenges him to a walk-off.

I Do Not Like Snoopy Reporter With Lack of Fashion Sense

I Do Not Like Snoopy Reporter With Lack of Fashion Sense

00:07

Katinka comments that she hates Matilda.

I Suggest You And Your K-Mart Jaclyn Smith Collection Outfit Stay The Hell Away From Derek Zoolander

I Suggest You And Your K-Mart Jaclyn Smith Collection Outfit Stay The Hell Away From Derek Zoolander

00:08

Katinka threatens Matilda to stay away from Derek and, as usual, pokes fun at...

How Can We Be Expected To Teach Children To Learn How To Read If They Can't Even Fit Inside The Building?

How Can We Be Expected To Teach Children To Learn How To Read If They Can't Even Fit Inside The Building?

00:07

Derek totally misunderstands that the model that Mugatu has showed him is jus...

Are You Not Aware I Get Farty And Bloated With a Foamy Latte?

Are You Not Aware I Get Farty And Bloated With a Foamy Latte?

00:09

Mugatu spits out his latte onto Todd and yells at him because too much foam m...

It's That Damn Hansel! He's So Hot Right Now!

It's That Damn Hansel! He's So Hot Right Now!

00:04

Mugatu gets pissed that Hansel steps in and changes the trigger music for Der...

Put a Cork in It, Zane

Put a Cork in It, Zane

00:02

Derek makes a comment to Billy Zane who tells him to not go through with the ...

Take A Crap, Wrap It In Tin Foil

Take A Crap, Wrap It In Tin Foil

00:09

Maury does his best to persuade Derek to do Mugatu's new campaign Derelicte.

Good-Looking People Like Us Made You Throw Up And Feel Bad About Yourself

Good-Looking People Like Us Made You Throw Up And Feel Bad About Yourself

00:06

Derek apologizes to Matilda about her bulimic past, due to her wanting to be ...

For a Second There, I Thought Someone Was Gonna Be Reading Our Eugoogoly

For a Second There, I Thought Someone Was Gonna Be Reading Our Eugoogoly

00:03

Derek and Matilda escape Mugatu's thugs and Derek is happy they weren't killed.

And Most Important of All, Models Don't Think for Themselves

And Most Important of All, Models Don't Think for Themselves

00:10

J.P explains why male models are perfect for being brainwashed into assassins.

There It Is! Magnum!

There It Is! Magnum!

00:03

Everyone gets to see Derek's new look Magnum for the first time. It's the sam...

I Was Always More Interested In What Bark Was Made Out Of On A Tree

I Was Always More Interested In What Bark Was Made Out Of On A Tree

00:30

Hansel's voice-over plays for the Male Model of the Year video.

You Can Read Minds?

You Can Read Minds?

00:17

Matilda tells Hansel and Derek that she became bulimic after she was made fun...

Die, You Wage-Hiking Scum!

Die, You Wage-Hiking Scum!

00:44

Mugatu freaks out and comments on how all of Derek's looks are the same and a...

In The Computer

In The Computer

00:02

Hansel whispers to himself that the files are in the computer. He thinks that...

I Caught My Reflection in a Spoon While I Was Eating My Cereal

I Caught My Reflection in a Spoon While I Was Eating My Cereal

00:16

Matilda interviews Derek and asks him when he knew he wanted to be a model.

I Got A Prostate The size Of A Honeydew

I Got A Prostate The size Of A Honeydew

00:04

Maury tells Mugatu he's selling him out on all the crimes he's committed in t...

You Is Talkin' Loco, and I Like It

You Is Talkin' Loco, and I Like It

00:03

Hansel tells Derek he likes his idea of disguising themselves to get into Mau...

I'm Sorry I Was Whack

I'm Sorry I Was Whack

00:02

Derek apologizes to Hansel for fighting earlier.

Gotta Tame The Beast Before You Let It Out Of Its Cage

Gotta Tame The Beast Before You Let It Out Of Its Cage

00:12

Billy Zane asks Derek when he'll be releasing his new look, but Derek won't say.

Let Me Show You... Derelicte!

Let Me Show You... Derelicte!

00:17

Mugatu introduces Derek to his new fashion collection "Derelicte".

So Join Now, Because At The Derek Zoolander Center For Kids

So Join Now, Because At The Derek Zoolander Center For Kids

00:12

Derek talks during a commercial for his new school for kids who can't read good.

That's What I'm Talking About!

That's What I'm Talking About!

00:02

Maury gives the kids a lesson in business at Derek's new school and praises t...

Screw Him! Hold Out for More!

Screw Him! Hold Out for More!

00:14

Maury teaches the kids at Derek's new school a bit about business.

I Know.  I Turned Left!

I Know. I Turned Left!

00:05

Derek saves the Prime Minister of Malaysia and doesn't even realize it becaus...

One Look? One Look? I Don't Think So!

One Look? One Look? I Don't Think So!

00:07

Derek gets mad after being accused of every one of his looks being the same a...

I Invented the Piano Key Necktie!

I Invented the Piano Key Necktie!

00:11

Mugatu tries to prove that he's better than Derek.

Doesn't Anyone Notice This? I Feel Like I'm Taking Crazy Pills!

Doesn't Anyone Notice This? I Feel Like I'm Taking Crazy Pills!

00:04

Mugatu doesn't understand how no one but him can notice that all of Derek's l...

I Need You to Bring That Zip Disk in the Den Down to the Fashion Show

I Need You to Bring That Zip Disk in the Den Down to the Fashion Show

00:23

Maury calls his wife to bring his back up files to the fashion show and she g...

You Have No Evidence. Han-Stupid Destroyed Everything

You Have No Evidence. Han-Stupid Destroyed Everything

00:04

Mugatu tells Maury that Hansel destroyed the files in his computer when he dr...

I Know it Was You, Maury.

I Know it Was You, Maury.

00:06

Like in the Godfather where Michael tells Fredo he knew it was him that betra...

They're In the Computer?

They're In the Computer?

00:13

Hansel has no idea how computers work so he doesn't what "files" are. Matilda...

Did You Press the Apple Thing?

Did You Press the Apple Thing?

00:06

Derek and Hansel have no idea how to turn on Maury's computer so they can ret...

I Feel Really Bad that Good Looking People Like Us Made You Throw Up and Feel Bad About Yourself

I Feel Really Bad that Good Looking People Like Us Made You Throw Up and Feel Bad About Yourself

00:17

Derek tells Matilda that he feels bad that models made her bulimic.

But They Won't be Looking for Not Us.

But They Won't be Looking for Not Us.

00:09

Derek comes up with a plan to disguise themselves so they can sneak into Maur...

Derek, I Thought I Told You to Turn Off Your Phone. Turn Off My Phone?

Derek, I Thought I Told You to Turn Off Your Phone. Turn Off My Phone?

00:08

Derek can't believe Matilda asked him to turn off his phone because it's so i...

How About a Good Afternoon, Derek and Hansel.  Thanks for the Freak Fest Last Night.

How About a Good Afternoon, Derek and Hansel. Thanks for the Freak Fest Last Night.

00:08

Matilda wakes up and finds Derek and Hansel and immediately jumps to business...

Oh, Snap!

Oh, Snap!

00:02

Derek's response to hearing Matilda hasn't had sex in 2 years.

Do You, Like, Service Yourself 10 Times a Day?

Do You, Like, Service Yourself 10 Times a Day?

00:20

Matilda makes the mistake of telling Hansel and Derek how long it's been sinc...

I Throw Up After a Lot of Meals

I Throw Up After a Lot of Meals

00:08

Derek and Hansel admit to also being bulimic but don't understand that it's a...

So What?  I Throw Up After Lots of Meals

So What? I Throw Up After Lots of Meals

00:23

Derek and Hansel laugh at Matilda when she tells them she used to be bulimic ...

I Became Bulimic.

I Became Bulimic.

00:29

Matilda spills her heart to Hansel and Derek and they have no idea what bulim...

When I was in Seventh Grade, I was the Fat Kid in My Class.

When I was in Seventh Grade, I was the Fat Kid in My Class.

00:07

Matilda starts off her story as to why she hates models and Derek comments.

Why Do You Hate Models, Matilda?

Why Do You Hate Models, Matilda?

00:21

Derek, Hansel and Matilda have a heart to heart at Hansel's house while they ...

I'm Sorry I was Whack.

I'm Sorry I was Whack.

00:10

Derek and Hansel make up after their little tiff and become friends.

Why You Been Acting So Messed Up Towards Me?

Why You Been Acting So Messed Up Towards Me?

00:39

Derek and Matilda show up to hide out a Hansel's because it's the last place ...

But Why Male Models?

But Why Male Models?

00:12

J.P. just finishes explaining why male models are a perfect target for the ba...

You're a Monkey, Derek! You're a Monkey!

You're a Monkey, Derek! You're a Monkey!

00:08

Derek thinks about one of his photo shoots where he was told what to do.

Listen and Learn Sweetness

Listen and Learn Sweetness

00:17

J.P. starts to explain to Matilda and Derek that the modeling industry has be...

Vin Correjo. Derriere Extraordinaire.

Vin Correjo. Derriere Extraordinaire.

00:06

Matilda and Derek go to meet J.P. at a cemetery and Derek reads one of the he...

I'm Not an Ambi-Turner

I'm Not an Ambi-Turner

00:03

Derek admits he can't turn left.

I'm Not An Ambi-Turner

I'm Not An Ambi-Turner

00:35

Derek tells Matilda a little secret about him that he can't turn left. He thi...

I'm Going Monk.  I Gotta Go Monk.

I'm Going Monk. I Gotta Go Monk.

00:07

During the walk-off, Hansel goes Monk which means he's going to take off his ...

You Gotta Cut Me. I Can't See. I'm Blind Out There

You Gotta Cut Me. I Can't See. I'm Blind Out There

00:08

During the walk-off Hansel asks his corner to cut a strand of hair because he...

If Nobody Has Any Objections, I Believe I Might Be of Service

If Nobody Has Any Objections, I Believe I Might Be of Service

00:08

David Bowie steps up and says he'll judge the walk-off.

Han-Sell-Out Is About to Have His Han-Sell-Ass Handed to Him on a Platter

Han-Sell-Out Is About to Have His Han-Sell-Ass Handed to Him on a Platter

00:05

Derek tells Matilda to not bother him as he preps for his walk-off.

What Say We Settle This on the Runway, Han-Solo?

What Say We Settle This on the Runway, Han-Solo?

00:23

Derek challenges Hansel to a walk-off.

It's a Walk-Off

It's a Walk-Off

00:03

Billy Zane announced Derek and Hansel's walk off.

You Think You're Too Cool for School.

You Think You're Too Cool for School.

00:13

Derek tries to talk trash to Hansel. He's not very good at it.

I Can "Dere-Lick" My Own Balls, Thank You Very Much

I Can "Dere-Lick" My Own Balls, Thank You Very Much

00:16

Hansel talks trash to Derek after Derek tries to show off about his Derelicte...

Excuse Me, Bra

Excuse Me, Bra

00:12

Hansel bumps into Derek on purpose at his pre-runway party.

So Long as You Can Make a Name for Yourself as an Investigatory Journalist.

So Long as You Can Make a Name for Yourself as an Investigatory Journalist.

00:23

Derek goes off on a tangent because he's still upset about the article that M...

You Can't Come Barging Into People's Lofts Wanting Sex

You Can't Come Barging Into People's Lofts Wanting Sex

00:12

Derek thinks that Matilda shows up at his place to have sex with him, but she...

Earth to Matilda.  I Was At a Day Spa.

Earth to Matilda. I Was At a Day Spa.

00:08

After being missing for a week getting hypnotized to kill the Prime Minister ...

What, Are You Having a Whack Attack?

What, Are You Having a Whack Attack?

00:16

After being hypnotized by Mugatu, Derek ends up back at his apartment. He thi...

Obey My Dog!

Obey My Dog!

00:02

Part of Mugatu's hypnotizing video for Derek to kill the Prime Minister of Ma...

Prime Minister of Malaysia bad! Martial arts good!

Prime Minister of Malaysia bad! Martial arts good!

00:11

Derek gets hypnotized by Mugatu to kill the Prime Minister of Malaysia.

Just a Nice, Warm, Happy Time.

Just a Nice, Warm, Happy Time.

00:10

Mugatu hypnotizes Derek through a prepared video.

Keep Pulling the Sweater, Eventually The Whole Thing Will Unravel

Keep Pulling the Sweater, Eventually The Whole Thing Will Unravel

00:12

J.P calls Matilda at work and tips her off to keep investigating Mugatu and s...

Derek, I'd Like You to Meet Katinka Ingabogovinana

Derek, I'd Like You to Meet Katinka Ingabogovinana

00:05

Mugatu introduces Derek to Katinka. Aka Katinka Shanananana to those who can'...

Let Me Show You the Future of Fashion, Derelicte

Let Me Show You the Future of Fashion, Derelicte

00:10

Mugatu introduces his new line of clothing that he wants Derek to model made ...

With a push-up bra you could actually have a nice rack of lamb going on up there

With a push-up bra you could actually have a nice rack of lamb going on up there

00:05

Matilda asks Maury his opinion on Mugatu's exploitation of sweatshop workers ...

God? What the shit are you talking about?

God? What the shit are you talking about?

00:20

Derek has another one of his pondering moments where he's trying to find hims...

A center for ants

A center for ants

00:09

Derek destroys the model of his center when he thinks that it's the actual si...

What Is This? A center for ants?

What Is This? A center for ants?

00:21

Derek freaks out on Mugatu after thinking a model building is actual size for...

The center has to be at least three times bigger than this

The center has to be at least three times bigger than this

00:50

Mugatu unveils a model of Derek's idea for a reading center for kids who can'...

Are you no Aware that I get Farty and Bloated with a Foamy Latte?

Are you no Aware that I get Farty and Bloated with a Foamy Latte?

00:04

Mugatu spits out his coffee after Todd gives it to him because there was too ...

Derek's cell phone rings.

Derek's cell phone rings.

00:09

Derek's cell phone rings.

Mer-man Merman!

Mer-man Merman!

00:08

Derek corrects his dad that he didn't play a mermaid but a merman in an Aveda...

I Just Thank the Lord She Didn't Live to See Her Son as a Mermaid

I Just Thank the Lord She Didn't Live to See Her Son as a Mermaid

00:16

Derek's dad tells him that he's dead to him and that he's happy that his moth...

I'm Sorry I Was Born With This Perfect Bone Structure

I'm Sorry I Was Born With This Perfect Bone Structure

00:09

After a commercial where Derek plays a mermaid, Derek's dad gets embarrassed ...

I Think I'm Getting the Black Lung, Pop.

I Think I'm Getting the Black Lung, Pop.

00:10

After a few hours in the coal mine, Derek coughs and tells his dad he's getti...

Yeah, I Capisce. Now if I Could Only Ca-Piss

Yeah, I Capisce. Now if I Could Only Ca-Piss

00:17

Maury still on the phone with Mugatu, comments on his urination issues.

He's Talking about Going off to Ponder and Tutoring Underprivileged Retards or Some Shit

He's Talking about Going off to Ponder and Tutoring Underprivileged Retards or Some Shit

00:07

Maury calls Mugatu to tell him that he needs to find some other dumb model to...

Oh, I'm sorry. Did my Pin get in the way of your Ass?

Oh, I'm sorry. Did my Pin get in the way of your Ass?

00:10

Mugatu pricks a model in the ass during a fitting and blames her for being to...

What Do We Do When We Fall Off the Horse?

What Do We Do When We Fall Off the Horse?

00:17

Maury's example goes way over Derek's head as he tries to persuade him to ret...

He can Take a Crap, Wrap it in Tin Foil, put a Couple of Fishhooks on it and Sell it to Queen Elizabeth as Earrings.

He can Take a Crap, Wrap it in Tin Foil, put a Couple of Fishhooks on it and Sell it to Queen Elizabeth as Earrings.

00:08

Maury tells Derek that Mugatu wants him for his new campaign but Derek remind...

Ba Bada Ba!

Ba Bada Ba!

00:04

Maury bops out a tune before he gives Derek some news that Mugatu wants Derek...

Look Out! Tushy Squeeze!

Look Out! Tushy Squeeze!

00:02

Maury squeezes the ass of a model that walks past him.

We Could Call It the Derek Zoolander Center for Kids Who Can't Read Good

We Could Call It the Derek Zoolander Center for Kids Who Can't Read Good

00:06

Derek tells Maury about how he is thinking about opening a center for kids wh...

Not too many people I know read your little Time Magazine

Not too many people I know read your little Time Magazine

00:05

Derek tells Matilda how upset he is about the article she wrote about him, bu...

I Thought You Were Gonna Tell Me What a Bad Eugoogolizer I Am.

I Thought You Were Gonna Tell Me What a Bad Eugoogolizer I Am.

00:13

Derek keeps making himself look like an idiot to Matilda when he keeps saying...

Rufus, Brint and Meekus Were Like Brothers to Me

Rufus, Brint and Meekus Were Like Brothers to Me

00:15

After a his friends die during a gasoline fight Derek opens his eulogy.

Derek Zoolander, a Model Idiot?

Derek Zoolander, a Model Idiot?

00:05

While have a gasoline fight with his friends, Derek walks away and sees the c...

Orange Mocha Frappuccino!

Orange Mocha Frappuccino!

00:05

Todd, Brint and Meekus all scream at the same time a solution to Derek's sadn...

Maybe We Should be Doing Something More Meaningful with Our Lives

Maybe We Should be Doing Something More Meaningful with Our Lives

00:14

Derek talks to Brint, Meekus and Todd about wanting to do something more help...

Did you ever Think that Maybe There's More to Life than Being Really, Really, Really Ridiculously Good-Looking?

Did you ever Think that Maybe There's More to Life than Being Really, Really, Really Ridiculously Good-Looking?

00:08

Derek gets fed up with Meekus and Brint arguing over stupid stuff and wonders...

Earth to Brint. I Was Making a Joke

Earth to Brint. I Was Making a Joke

00:17

Brint and Meekus argue about a joke that they made about Hansel and whether B...

It's Like Ex-Squeeze Me, but have you Every Heard of Styling Gel?

It's Like Ex-Squeeze Me, but have you Every Heard of Styling Gel?

00:11

Meekus and Brint don't understand one another's sarcasm about Hansel and his ...

Who Am I?

Who Am I?

00:05

After embarrassing himself and going up on stage to accept the male model of ...

It Stings Me Like a Fissure in My Ass

It Stings Me Like a Fissure in My Ass

00:03

Maury comes to the realization that Derek is a perfect candidate for Mugatu's...

The Original Greek Word for Model Means Misshapen Ball of Clay

The Original Greek Word for Model Means Misshapen Ball of Clay

00:07

In Derek's reel for male model of the year, he tells the audience a little bi...

Male Modeling has had a Shadow Cast Over it by One Man

Male Modeling has had a Shadow Cast Over it by One Man

00:11

Derek's male model of the year reel starts to play for the audience.

Hansel

Hansel

00:03

The ending of Hansel's reel for male model of the year.

Do I Know what Product I'm Selling?  No.

Do I Know what Product I'm Selling? No.

00:10

Hansel gives more background information on himself not really realizing he s...

I was Always More Interested in What Bark was Made Out of on a Tree

I was Always More Interested in What Bark was Made Out of on a Tree

00:21

Hansel gives the audience a little background on what he's like and things he...

I Live with a lot of Flair

I Live with a lot of Flair

00:09

Hansel gives the audience an insight of how he lives his life.

I Hear a lot of Words like Beauty and Handsomeness and Incredibly Chiseled Features.

I Hear a lot of Words like Beauty and Handsomeness and Incredibly Chiseled Features.

00:11

While playing Hansel's male model of the year reel, he talks about words that...

That Hansel's So Hot Right Now

That Hansel's So Hot Right Now

00:02

Mugatu talks about how hot Hansel is as they watch his reel for male model of...

You Consider me the Best Actor Slash Model, and Not the Other Way Around

You Consider me the Best Actor Slash Model, and Not the Other Way Around

00:10

Fabio accepts his award for actor/model because he prefers to be an actor fir...

They're Break-Dance Fighting

They're Break-Dance Fighting

00:02

Mugatu comments while Hansel is up in the music booth at the runway show tryi...

Hey, Mugatu! Screw You and Your Little Dog Too!

Hey, Mugatu! Screw You and Your Little Dog Too!

00:06

A crazy protester throws an egg at Mugatu while he's on the red carpet.

Not as much as I'm Worried about Gretel.

Not as much as I'm Worried about Gretel.

00:06

Derek tries to make a joke and look cool in front of the camera.

I'm Shvitzing like a Shmedrik with all these Lights

I'm Shvitzing like a Shmedrik with all these Lights

00:03

Maury cuts his interview short because the spot lights are making him hot on ...

Maury Ballstein, Balls Models

Maury Ballstein, Balls Models

00:02

Maury introduces himself to the interviewer who is interviewing Derek.

There Are a Couple of Little Butterflies in My Basket

There Are a Couple of Little Butterflies in My Basket

00:04

Derek answers Steve's question about whether or not he's nervous about going ...

Ugly Protestors Bothering Beautiful People

Ugly Protestors Bothering Beautiful People

00:06

The announcer makes a comment as Mugatu walks down the red carpet and is heck...

How Many Abo-Digitals do you see Modeling?

How Many Abo-Digitals do you see Modeling?

00:08

Derek answers Matilda's question about what he thinks about the aboriginal tr...

It's Almost Like the New Afro for the White Man

It's Almost Like the New Afro for the White Man

00:09

Cuba Gooding Jr. comments on how much he loves Derek Zoolander.

Magnum? That's Intriguing Can I See That?

Magnum? That's Intriguing Can I See That?

00:08

Derek refuses to let Matilda see his pose, "Magnum".

Le Tigre's a Lot Softer. It's a Little Bit More of a Catalog Look

Le Tigre's a Lot Softer. It's a Little Bit More of a Catalog Look

00:07

Derek shows off his Le Tigre look which is exactly the same as Blue Steel.

Well, I Guess the Look I'm Best Known for is Blue Steel

Well, I Guess the Look I'm Best Known for is Blue Steel

00:08

Derek tells Matilda the look he's best known for, Blue Steel.

Be Professionally Good-Looking

Be Professionally Good-Looking

00:08

Derek tells Matilda how one day he discovered he was good looking and how he ...

Wow, You're Ridiculously Good-Looking. Maybe you Could do that for a Career

Wow, You're Ridiculously Good-Looking. Maybe you Could do that for a Career

00:04

Derek answers Matilda's question about when he realized that he wanted to be ...

So When Did You Know You Wanted to Be a Model?

So When Did You Know You Wanted to Be a Model?

00:15

Derek tells Matilda when he knew he wanted to be a male model.

That's Fashion Week. It's Impossible! I Have a Show!

That's Fashion Week. It's Impossible! I Have a Show!

00:02

Mugatu tells the committee he won't be able to kill the Prime Minister of Mal...

My Entire Panty Line is Made in Vietnam

My Entire Panty Line is Made in Vietnam

00:06

One of the committee members complains that they may not be able to get their...

I've tried bribes, I've tried gifts. I even sent him some pet oxen.

I've tried bribes, I've tried gifts. I even sent him some pet oxen.

00:12

Mugatu talks about what he did to try and bribe the Malaysian Prime Minister ...

I Have Negotiated My Butt Off, Giorgio

I Have Negotiated My Butt Off, Giorgio

00:04

Mugatu talks to the committee about trying to work with the Malaysian Prime M...

I Thought You Were Gonna Tell Me What a Bad Eugoogolizer I Am

I Thought You Were Gonna Tell Me What a Bad Eugoogolizer I Am

00:13

Matilda tries to catch up with Derek to talk to him after writing a bad artic...

What's the Dealio, Yo?

What's the Dealio, Yo?

00:02

Hansel asks Matilda why she isn't a fan of models.

Oh, Snap!

Oh, Snap!

00:02

Derek's responds to hearing Matilda say she hasn't had sex in a few years.

Thanks for the Freak Fest Last Night

Thanks for the Freak Fest Last Night

00:18

After a wild night full of sex with Derek, Hansel and company, Matilda wakes ...

Taste My Pain, Bitch!

Taste My Pain, Bitch!

00:03

Hansel yells to Katinka to distract her before he throws a Yo-Yo at her hand ...

And I Felt Like, This Guy's Really Hurting Me, and It Hurt

And I Felt Like, This Guy's Really Hurting Me, and It Hurt

00:06

Hansel really digs deep for this line to say to Derek while they make up and ...

I'm Not an Ambi-Turner

I'm Not an Ambi-Turner

00:03

Derek tells Matilda of his major weaknesses after she complains about how per...

So, I'm Repelling Down Mount Vesuvius...

So, I'm Repelling Down Mount Vesuvius...

00:29

Hansel tells Derek and Matilda one of his trippy stories from when he was on ...

I Friggin' Worship You, Man

I Friggin' Worship You, Man

00:02

Hansel says to Derek after they make up and Derek needs a place to hide out f...

But Why Male Models?

But Why Male Models?

00:10

After J.P goes on explaining about why people are targeting male models to do...

Seriously. Do You, Like, Service Yourself Ten Times a Day?

Seriously. Do You, Like, Service Yourself Ten Times a Day?

00:03

Derek comments after finding out that Matilda hasn't had sex in a couple years.

What Say We Settle This on the Runway. Han-Solo?

What Say We Settle This on the Runway. Han-Solo?

00:22

Derek challenges Hansel to a walk-off to really see who the best male model is.

It's a Walk-Off

It's a Walk-Off

00:01

Billy Zane announces that Hansel and Derek are having a walk-off.

There's More to Life Than Being Really, Really Ridiculously Good Looking

There's More to Life Than Being Really, Really Ridiculously Good Looking

00:07

After having one of their many stupid conversations, Derek takes a step back ...

Moisture Is the Essence of Wetness And Wetness Is The Essence of Beauty

Moisture Is the Essence of Wetness And Wetness Is The Essence of Beauty

00:13

After quitting modeling, Derek goes back to his coal mining family and after ...

Damn It, Derek, I'm a Coal Miner, Not a Professional Film and Television Actor

Damn It, Derek, I'm a Coal Miner, Not a Professional Film and Television Actor

00:05

Derek goes back to his roots to become a coal miner and isn't as well accepte...

I'm Pretty Sure There's a Lot More to Life Than Being Really, Really Good-Looking

I'm Pretty Sure There's a Lot More to Life Than Being Really, Really Good-Looking

00:08

At his best friend's funeral, Derek announces he's retiring from modelling to...